Love

Reasons for a Divorce

2008-12-31T07:23:00.001+05:30

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?"

"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents."

He said, "Do you have a real grudge?"

"No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."

"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes."

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?"

"Yes," she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do."

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can't communicate with me."

How to HUG & Kiss

2008-12-29T07:31:00.000+05:30

How to HUG

Hugs are an important expression of affection. By hugging someone, you remind them that you care about them and support them.

Depending on the person's relationship to you, you might want to approach differently:

Family Hug: You can keep talking when hugging; it will not ruin the momentum. Where you place your hands is not important; the hugged won't think it over too much. Press gently; it is not necessary to have head-contact. Stroke your hands quickly across the top of the hugged's back. Smile when letting go.

Friend Hug (girls): Close your eyes and think about how much you love your friend when hugging. Press as much as you feel like. (But don't squish!) Do not clap the hugged on the shoulders or such; it's too masculine and some girls think you don't like them if you do it the guys' way.

Friend Hug (guys): Embrace strongly, and clap each other on the top of your backs. If it's an emotional moment, keep in the hugged position for a brief moment and do not clap each other's backs.

Crush Hug: Press the hugged warmly towards you. If you are a man, remember that it is more masculine and more protective to fold your arms under hers. Her arms should be around your neck, and you should be embracing her around the waist. When pressing her against you, you can lift her up a bit, pressing her chest and upper stomach against yours. Keep it in that position for a while, and then let go. Look her in the eyes when you separate and continue the conversation naturally.

Lover Hug: 1) Males: Carefully sliding your hands down from her shoulders, put them on her waist and slide them around her lower back. Put your head on her shoulder and press her towards you for as long as you like. If you want to, you can give her a small massage with your hands, and try to warm her. When separating, you can look into her eyes, smile genuinely and, if the situation is fitting, kiss her. 2) Females: Extend your arms toward him and hold them around his neck and shoulders. Lean as close as possible and press your torso against his. In situations of extreme intimacy, interlocking your leg in his is appropriate. Avoid holding your arms below his shoulders and/or embracing strongly and tensely.

Don't hug too tightly. The best way to judge how tightly or loosely to hug is to let whomever you're hugging indicate what they want by how hard they squeeze. If they are soft, be soft back; if they like bear hugs and squeeze tightly, hug back the same way (but don't suffocate him/her).

Don't let go too early. A hug is a powerful way to communicate your caring for another person, as it can feel great and greatly improve one's mood. If someone hugs you, they may want a long, loving hug (maybe they are upset or down), so just go along with it and hug them until they let go or loosen their hold.

Graffitti 18+

2008-12-25T13:29:00.000+05:30

· Sex is Evil, Evil is sin, Sins are Forgiven, So Sex is In!	· Viagra now available in powder to put in tea, does nothing for erections but stops your biscuit from going soft.

· An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card	· Without a doubt, women are the foundation stone of the society; but always remember who laid them!

· If necessity is the mother of invention, then… Frustration is the father of masturbation!	· Always marry a woman with small palms. It makes your dick look bigger !

· I believe in safe sex...I've got a handrail around the bed.	· Just remember: No matter how hot & sexy a babe is, someone somewhere is tired of fuckin her!

· The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.	· Life without Friends is like Boobs without Nipples... POINTLESS !

· Go braless: it'll pull the wrinkles out of your face.	· The importance of UNITY explained at it's best: What did one leg of a woman tell dthe other: UNITED we are saved, Divided we are Fucked.
· Old Proverb: A smile is a curve that makes everything straight. New Proverb: Boobs are curves that make something super straight...!	· Slogan on a boy's T-shirt: Please tell your boobs not to stare at my eyes.

· In life, never look down on anybody, unless you are getting a lovely view of the cleavage!	· The definition of an optimist is a woman who loads up the CD changer before making love.

· When the toilet paper of experience is depleted, the *** of reason goes unwiped.	· My wife and I finally became sexually compatible... We achieve simultaneous headaches.

· Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?	· Go on. Add some variety to your sex life... Use the other hand!

· Memory is like an orgasm. It's a lot better if you don't have to fake it.	· Fuck a girl & she'll love you... Love a girl & she'll fuck you!

· A hooker once told me she had a headache.	· Most men have split personalities; They hate cats but love pussies.
· Men give love to get sex, Women give sex to get love.	· Most men approve of premarital sex until daughters are born.

· A pussy is like a potato chip: You can't eat just one.	· Did God make you an asshole, or did you evolve?

· A hooker once told me she had a headache.	· Men play the game. Women know the score.

· Too much sex is not good for one but rather nice for two!	· A girl can be poor in history but great on dates!

· Women like to spoon in bed, whereas men just like to fork.	· Go on. Add some variety to your sex life... Use the other hand!

· Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?	· My wife and I finally became sexually compatible...We achieve simultaneous headaches.
· When the toilet paper of experience is depleted, the ass of reason goes unwiped.	· Nature invented sex as a reward for letting go of childhood.

· The definition of an optimist is a woman who loads up the CD changer before making love.	· Viagra now available in powder to put in tea, does nothing for erections but stops your biscuit from going soft.

· Money is just like arse... Everybody has it, but nobody wants to give it !	· Practice safe sex, go fuck yourself.

· Height of conceit : Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.	· My wife says my sex drive has taken up walking.

· 9 out of 10 men prefer large breasts. The other man prefers the 9 men.	· Cleavage is something you can look down on and approve of at the same time

· Money is jst like arse... everybody has it, but.... nobody wants to give it !	· Success is like masturbation, only ur own hand can let u acheive it.
· Educatuon is like hiring a prostitute, it needs both money & hard work.	· Work is like a gangbang, ten people are behind ur ass 2 take ur place.

· Fate is like getting raped, if u can't fight it learn to njoy it.	· Success is like masturbation, only ur own hand can let u acheive it.

· Men are like vacations...They never seem to last long enough	· I believe in safe sex...I've got a handrail around the bed

· Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?	· I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight

· You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me	· All those who proclaim that dog is man's best friend, have evidently not played with a pussy.

· Civilized people need love for full sexual satisfaction	· Without a doubt, women are the foundation stone of the society; but always remember who laid them!
· Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring	· Masturbation is like procrastination, it's all good and fun until you realize you are only fucking yourself.

· An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card	· Go braless: it'll pull the wrinkles out of your face

· The irony of a blow job is that even if you have her at your feet she's got you by the balls.	· I'm definitely claustrophobic. I have a morbid fear of tight spaces. Thankfully, with my girlfriend, I'll never have a problem with that

· Friends are like condoms; they protect you when things get hard	· You know it's always business doing pleasure with you

· I am skilled at the art of love. I just wish I had a bigger paintbrush	· The only loss that causes sense of achievement is Virginity.

· A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing it	· I guess you could call me a polygamist.Sometimes I switch hands.
· Without nipples, breasts would be pointless.	· Make love not war because Condoms are cheaper than Guns!

· Silence doesn't mean your sexual performance left her speechless.	· Never dance naked because the body has parts that do not stop moving when the music stops.

· Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.	· Definition of will power: Looking into the eyes of a topless waitress!

· It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl	· One of the side effects of Viagra is a headache. Every time I take a pill, my wife gets a headache.

· I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.	· There is a tax on sex... it's called 'children'.

· Happiness is like penis; always looks small if you hold it in your hands but when you learn to share it, you'll realize how big & precious it is!	· Sex is the only activity where you start at the top and work your way to the bottom, while getting a raise.
· girl who opens her hands receives gifts. Who opens her heart receives love. Who opens her legs receives HAPPENIS.	· Wives are funny creatures... They don't have sex with their husbands for weeks and then they want to kill the woman who does!

· Too much arousal can bring on a hard-attack.	· New AIDS awareness slogan: Try different positions with the same woman instead of same position with different women.

· Guys are like roses, just watch out for the pricks.	· Go on. Add some variety to your sex life...Use the other hand!

· I'm so horny, I get aroused when I squeeze into a tight parking place.	· College is like a woman; you work so hard to get in and nine months later you wish you'd never come.

· Honeymoon Salad: Lettuce alone, with no dressing.	· Text msgs are like a blow job from an amateur prostitute......short sweet and cheap!

· I think I've reached my sexpiration date.	· Men are like bagpipes... you won`t get anywhere unless you blow them first!
· My pregnant girlfriend reminds me of a burned cake. I wish I had removed it a minute earlier.	· I Must Be a Proctologist Because I Work With Assholes.

· Sex is the only activity where you start at the top and work your way to the bottom, while getting a raise.	· Do a mouse a favour... Eat a Pussy!

· When I was a baby, I played with toys. Now I'm a lady and I play with boys!	· Vitamins are good for what ails you. Viagra is good for what fails you.

· If it were truly the thought that counted, more women would be pregnant.	· Text messaging is like a blowjob off an amateur prostitute; short...sweet and always cheap!

· When I was a baby, I played with toys. Now I'm a lady and I play with boys!	· If you are being raped and you cannot defend yourself... keep still and enjoy it!

· Life is like a dick! When it's hard Fuck it!	· Whenever you feel low, depressed or useless, remember that you are the same sperm that won a battle against a million others.

Some TIPS for arranged marriage _ Pls take it as fun nothing Serious

2008-12-19T22:44:00.000+05:30

Arranged marriage

There are times in a person's life when he needs to take crucial decisions on his own. Marriage is one of them. Believe me, the decision on whom to marry is the most important decision a person will make in his life. After marriage, your wife is the most important person in your life. She can make or break your life. The mere thought of this is very frightening.

Some of the questions that crop up are –

· What sort of a girl do I marry?

· Will she adjust in my family?

· How can I decide on a girl by just meeting her for a few times?

· When should I get married?

· This is my life. So, I should choose the girl I marry, but then what if I make a mistake?

…. so on and so forth…

I will try to address these & many more questions in the following sections.

The Nine Rules of Arranged marriage

· Rule 1 – Magic no. 28

In an ideal scenario, a girl goes to college at the age of 18. By the time she graduates, goes for her post graduation and/ or works for 1-2 years, she will be about 23- 24. This means that she has spent about 5 years away from her home. In the 5 years period, she would meet many smart guys at college or during her first few years on job. So, in all probability it would be difficult to find a good girl older than 24 yrs. Secondly, in Indian families there is lot of pressure on the girl's to get married by the time they become 24-25.

Statistics says that there is a generation gap after every 5 years. So, in such scenario, one would prefer to marry a girl who is about 3-4 years younger to you. Thus, working backwards, an ideal age for a guy to get married is by 28. Earlier the marriage, the better it is.

Well, as we all know, in the current market scenario, there will never be stability in our career. So, I believe there is no such thing as, "I will marry when I settle down".

· Rule 2 -- Subset of marriage-able girls

At times you hear statements like, "I am not getting the right match, I will look after 3 months, I will find a better match then". Well the truth is otherwise. The subset of unmarried girl looking for a match is fixed. From this subset, there would be girls who would get married & there would be new girls added who would be looking for a match. The net result is that at any given time, the variety & number of marriage-able girls are fixed.

· Rule 3 – Competition for girls

Like all other facets of life, there is lot of competition for good girls. In my own case, I was rejected by girls. So, if you are looking for a girl who is post graduate, done her Engg, is working, very beautiful, smart, from a good family etc. etc, just think again. There are other guys who are also looking for similar girls & probably they are better off than you in terms of career, looks personality etc. Given a choice every guy would like to marry Aishwarya Rai, but then for all Ashs in the world, there are many Salman Khans who also want to marry them. So, set your expectations accordingly.

· Rule 4 -- Understanding girls

You would have met a lot of people during your life. As we all know, its difficult to judge a person based on a few meetings. I am sure you would agree with me that in case of girls it is even more difficult to understand them in a few meetings. I am still trying to understand my wife… ;-).. Understanding your spouse is a life long assignment. So, then how do you select a girl based on a few meeting? This is where you need to take the help of your parents/ friends & latest technologies like email/ chat to choose your girl.

· Rule 5 – Society expectation

The selection process is tough on every one who is involved in the process. In arranged marriage, involvement of family & society is pretty high. You can't meet a girl 3-4 times & then say no to her. It is bad for her future. So, you should have a good short-listing criterion. Meet only a few girls & be sure what you are looking for. It is for the benefit of everyone involved.

· Rule 6 -- Marriage between equals

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you also marry into the girl's family. In arranged marriages, family support plays a major role in ensuring a successful marriage. This is where the compatibility of social status, family values & caste/ religion plays a major role. Its important to note that in case there is a perfect match between the two families, the marriage is destined to succeed.

· Rule 6 – Know yourself

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you first marry a person & then fall in love. So, it's very important that you do a self-assessment on the kind of person you would love. They say, "Opposite attract", while they also say, "Bird of same feather flock together". So, you take a call on what sort of person you like. Take a pen & paper; write down the kind of attributes you are looking for in a girl. Say, she should ideally have the looks of Sonia, the style of Monica, the voice of Sheena, the patience of Rashmi. You will certainly not find the perfect girl, but then you would have a good idea of what you are looking for.. The secret here is to set some minimum criteria for selection. Don't forget rule no.3 here.

· Rule 7 -- Girl's Beauty

A girl's looks attract, but then no one wants to end up marrying a dumb blonde. It is like buying your bike. When you initially buy it, you are crazy about the looks, but later on you love it for its reliability, fuel economy & comfort level. Similarly, a girl's looks are important, but then it should not be the most important criteria. Later on it life, you will get bored of her looks. It is then that her personality & behavior will make all the difference to your marriage. I am sure your parents will be able to advice you a lot better on this topic.

· Rule 8 -- Taking advice

As I have mentioned in the next rule, it's very important that the final decision on whom to marry must necessarily be yours. However, don't do the mistake of isolating yourself from the world while planning your marriage. Discuss with your parents & very close friends on this issue. They are your well wishers. Secondly, in such important matters its necessary that you analyze all possibilities. Remember, I am not suggesting that you follow others' advice, but don't forget to take their advice.

· Rule 9 -- Own decision

All said & done, it's your marriage & your life that is at stake. Once you are married, you & your wife are the only persons who will be facing the music. Don't marry a girl just because your parents or friends asked you to do so. After marriage, if things don't work out & you end up saying, "It's because of my friends or my parents that I married you", then your marriage is destined for disaster. If the girl is of your choice, it is you who will be responsible for whatever happens. That's when the marriage works out perfectly. So, ensure that you marriage the girl of your choice.

How to approach the selection process?

From the day, a person decides to get married; the selection process takes a minimum of 3 months. The whole process needs a lot of patience & commitment. The ideal steps to be followed are:

· Definition phase -- Define the minimum criteria for the kind of life partner you are looking for in terms of education, physical appearance, social status, family values, future career plans. Remember the Rule 3 here.

· Lead Generation phase -- Place ads in various newspapers, magazines, websites, through friends, family friends, family societies & association etc. You need to exhaust all possible means of getting biodatas at one go. Remember the Rule 2 here.

· Short listing phase – Based on your selection criteria, short-list the interesting biodatas. The general process followed for correspondence is as follows:

· The initiator sends a one page profile of himself/ herself

· Based on the profile, the receiver sends his/her one page profile along with request for detailed profile, photo, horoscope

· The initiator then sends the requested information along with a request for similar information

· The receiver send similar information

· If the biodata is selected, it is passed over to the next phase

· Casual interaction phase – Based on shortlisting, about 7 to 10 biodatas are taken forwarded to this phase. The next step to follow here is to exchange email/ chat ids. The guy & the girl then interact for 10 – 15 days to try & judge mutual compatibility through email/ chat.

· Family interaction phase – Based on the earlier phase, about 5 leads are taken for consideration in this phase. During this phase, the parents get involved & check the background information about the families to find mutual compatibility.

· The dating phase – Based on the earlier phase about 3 leads are taken forward to this phase. During this phase, the guy & the girl interact by going out alone for 2-3 times. The guy needs to prepare a set of simple questions like who is your favorite star, what are your hobbies? He needs to use his judgment to analyze the girl based on her responses.

· The D-day phase – Finally, the D-day comes when the guy has to select the girl he wants to spend his life with. If the process if followed systematically, there will be no ambiguity in deciding who should be your life partner..

Finally, my dear friends, marriage is all about compromises. In spite of all the planning that you do, there are a lot of uncertainties in a marriage. In fact this is the best part about marriage. Just remember that the person you marry must be of your choice. In such case, there would be no going back for both of you.

A few words of advice: To make your marriage a success; just believe in the age-old virtue,

"Never do anything to others that you don't like for yourse

still women loves man

2008-12-19T22:37:00.001+05:30

Interesting facts

Men are like computers hard to figure out and never have enough memory Still Women likes man

Men are like coolers load them with beer and you can take them anywhere Still Women likes man

Men are like chocolate bars sweet, smooth and they usually head right for your hips Still Women likes man

Men are like coffee the best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night Still Women likes man

Men are like horoscopes they always tell you what to do and are usually wrong Still Women likes man

Men are like cement after getting laid they take a long time to get hard Still Women likes man

41 ways to melt a women

2008-12-12T23:24:00.000+05:30

41 ways to melt a woman`s heart

Then you`re on your own

1. Ask her to dance.

2. On windy days, brush wayward strands of hair from her eyes and mouth.

3. When she's coming down the street, across the room, or up the stairs to meet you, walk towards her as soon as you see her.

4. Kiss her between her shoulder blades when she turns her back to you to go to sleep.

5. Put your arm around her when you introduce her to your friends and family.

6. Grasp her hand when a scantily dressed, beautiful woman walks by.

7. Call her when you're feeling sad.

8. Kiss her eyelids.

9. Ask to see a picture of her when she was a child.

10. Wash her from head to toe in the shower.

11. If she's crying on the phone, go over to her place. Immediately.

12. Stand her naked on a sturdy chair and **** between her legs.

13. Occasionally call her by her first and middle names.

14. Buy her your favourite rock album of all time on vinyl.

15. Order coffee for her, remembering exactly how she likes it.

16. Undress her and put her to bed when she falls asleep in the car.

17. Mention your upcoming anniversary before she does.

18. Send her something in the mail. Anything.

19. When she's feeling insecure, stare into her eyes and tell her there is no-one in the world who could be as right for you as she is.

20. Call her just before you get on the plane.

21. Pick her clothes up off the floor.

22. Try desperately to make her laugh when she's feeling down.

23. Take her to see your favourite sport live. Pay more attention to her than to the game.

24. Touch her arm when you leave the table to go to the bathroom. Touch her again when you come back.

25. Shave just before you see her. She'll notice.

26. Hug her when she gets jealous. Hug her hard.

27. Worship her breasts.

28. Give her jewellery.

29. Hand her two towels when she gets out of the shower. (The second one is for her hair.)

30. Ask her specific questions about her work.

31. Keep her favourite cereal on hand.

32. In the middle of a conversation, tell her you love her.

33. Send her very expensive flowers when you screw up.

34. Take her to a cabin with a fireplace. Build her a fire.

35. Moan her name when she goes down on you.

36. Read her a story when it's her turn to drive during a long road trip.

37. Offer to fix something at her place that you realise is broken.

38. Notice when she's wearing something new.

39. Make love to her standing up, against a wall.

40. Kiss her hand in front of your most die-hard bachelor buddies.

41. If she's too stressed to want sex...
a. Run a bath for her.
b. Give her a full-body massage.
c. Ask if she wants to wrestle.

Do You Know Your Wife

2008-11-23T06:30:00.000+05:30

A jealous husband hired a private detective to check on the movements of his wife. The husband wanted more than a written report; he wanted video of his wife's activities.

A week later, the detective returned with a video. They sat down together to watch it. Although the quality was less than professional, the man saw his wife meeting another man! He saw the two of them laughing in the park. He saw them enjoying themselves at an outdoor cafe. He saw them dancing in a dimly lit nightclub. He saw the man and his wife participate in dozens of activities with utter glee.

"I just can't believe this," the distraught husband said.

The detective said, "What's not to believe? It's right up there on the screen!"

The husband replied, "I can't believe that my wife could be so much fun!"

Marriage

2008-11-20T08:15:00.001+05:30

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.

That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

Dumas

The great question.... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?

Sigmund Freud

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."

Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."

Patrick Murray

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...

Anonymous

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

Henny Youngman

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Milton Berle

The Secret of a Successful Marriage

2008-11-20T08:15:00.000+05:30

Once upon a time a married couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary. They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in their period of 25 years. Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of their well known "happy going marriage".

Editor: " Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible? "

Husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: " We had been to Shimla for honeymoon after marriage. Having selected the horse riding finally, we both started the ride on different horses. My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one. On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "This is your first time".

She again climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened again. This time she again kept calm and said "This is your second time" and continued.

When the horse dropped her third time, she silently took out the revolver from the purse and shot the horse dead !!

I shouted at my wife: "What did you do you psycho. You killed the poor animal. Are you crazy?"

She gave a silent look and said: "This is your first time!!!"

Husband: "That's it. We are happy ever after."

Love, Wealth and Success

2008-11-14T22:03:00.000+05:30

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out."

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"

The woman went out and invited the men in"

"We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How nice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter-in- law was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter-in- law's advice," said the husband to his wife.

"Go out and invite Love to be our guest."

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."

Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"

The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!!!!! !"

MY WISH FOR YOU...

-Where there is pain, I wish you peace and mercy.
-Where there is self-doubting, I wish you a renewed confidence in your ability to work through it.
-Where there is tiredness, or exhaustion, I wish you understanding, patience, and renewed strength.
-Where there is fear, I wish you love, and courage.

You have two choices right now:
1. Click this off
2. Invite love by sharing this story with all the people you care about.

I hope you will choose #2. I did.

The True Meaning of Love

2008-11-13T21:30:00.001+05:30

The True Meaning of LOVE - A Touching Story

My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling. Five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness. . . I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

"Why?" he asked, shocked. "I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!" I answered. He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times

My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was a man who can't even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked me:" What can I do to change your mind?" Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered : "Here is the question, if you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind, Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?" He said :" I will give you your answer tomorrow.... " My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes....

My dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further.." This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading. "When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails,and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand... and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face...

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die.. " My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting. .... and as I continue on reading...

"Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk...

I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread...... Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's life, and love. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms, even very small and cheeky forms, it has never been a model, it could be the most dull and boring form.. . flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands... and that's our life... Love, not words win arguments...

Female Point System (just for fun)

2008-11-11T07:45:00.001+05:30

In the world of romance, one single rule applies to men:

Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points.

Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.

You don't get any points for doing something she expects.

Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

You make the bed (+1)

You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)

You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) , In the rain (+8)But return with Beer (-5)

You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)

You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)

You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)

You pummel it with iron rod (+10)

It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)

You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy

(-2)

Named Rita (-4)

Rita is a dancer (-6)

Rita is single and is really beautiful (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY

You forget her birthday (-50000)

You take her out to dinner (0)

You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)

Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)

And it's all-you-can- eat night (-3)

It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the

colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+2)

You take her to a movie she likes (+4)

You take her to a movie you hate (+6)

You take her to a movie you like (-2)

It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)

You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans(-15)

ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION

She asks, 'Do I look fat?' (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, 'Where?' (-35)

Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks

like a concerned __ex-pression (0)

You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)

You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)

She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Now what chance do you have???

Pass it on to the poor fellows for info & to the gals for a good laugh !

Happily Single or Happily Married

2008-11-06T22:48:00.000+05:30

Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy because we will always want to have something else or something more. - Brother David Steindl-Rast :

Contentment is the key to happiness. If we are contented with what we have or whom we are, we will find true happiness. Success is not the key to happiness but rather happiness is the key to success.

Happiness mainly comes from our own attitude, rather than from external factors. If your own mental attitude is correct, even if you remain in a hostile atmosphere, you can still feel happy.-H.H. the Dalai Lama:

The process of being happy does not depend on others. You create your own happiness.If you love what you are doing , you will find happiness.

You can be happy as a single as well as being in marriage but I think I rather prefer to be married and being happy because of the joys of a family life and snuggled up in the warm embrace of a loving relationship.

Life is more fulfilling and compassionate when you have children in marriage. It gives meaning to what life is all about . A man who does not marry is like a fruit tree which flowers but bears no fruit.When he grows old, he will be cold ,lonely and living in an empty void.

It is not that they do not want to marry but their expectations are too high or too perfect and no one can live up to their standards or they have not found the right one yet.

If you are single ,be happy and if you are married, be happy too. Being married is full of challenges and if there are no challenges in life, life would not be worth living.

This Will Make You Cry...

2008-11-01T08:41:00.000+05:30

Jenny was so happy about the house they had found.

For once in her life it was on the right side of town.

She unpacked her things with such great ease.

As she watched her new curtains blow in the breeze.

How wonderful it was to have her own room.

School would be starting; she'd have friends over soon.

There'd be sleep-overs, and parties; she was so happy

It's just the way she wanted her life to be.

On the first day of school, everything went great.

She made new friends and even got a date!

She thought, "I want to be popular and I'm going to be,

Because I just got a date with the star of the team!"

To be known in this school you had to have a clout,

And dating this guy would sure help her out.

There was only one problem stopping her fate.

Her parents had said she was too young to date.

"Well, I just won't tell them the entire truth.

They won't know the difference; what's there to lose?"

Jenny asked to stay with her friends that night.

Her parents frowned but said, "All right."

Excited, she got ready for the big event

But as she rushed around like she had no sense,

She began to feel guilty about all the lies,

But what's a pizza, a party, and a moonlight ride?

Well the pizza was good, and the party was great,

But the moonlight ride would have to wait.

For Jeff was half drunk by this time.

She felt someone remove her from the twisted rubble,

And heard, call an ambulance!

These kids are in trouble!

Voices she heard...a few words at best.

But she knew there were two cars

involved in the wreck.

Then wondered to herself if Jeff was all right,

And if the people in the other car was alive.

She awoke in the hospital to faces so sad.

"You've been in a wreck and it looks pretty bad."

These voices echoed inside her head,

As they gently told her that Jeff was dead.

They said "Jenny, we've done all we can do.

But it looks as if we'll lose you too."

"But the people in the other car!? "Jenny cried.

"We're sorry, Jenny, they also died."

Jenny prayed, "God, forgive me for what I've done

I only wanted to have just one night of fun."

"Tell those people's family, I've made their lives dim,

And wish I could return their families to them."

"Tell Mom and Dad I'm sorry I lied,

And that it's my fault so many have died.

Oh, nurse, won't you please tell them that for me?"

The nurse just stood there-she never agreed.

But took Jenny's hand with tears in her eyes.

And a few moments later Jenny died.

A man asked the nurse,

"Why didn't you do your best?"

To bid that girl her one last request?"

She looked at the man with eyes so sad.

"Because the people in the other car

were her mom and dad."

This story is sad and unpleasant but true,

So young people take heed, it could have been you.

The seven ways to sniff out if your partner is true to you.

2008-10-30T18:00:00.000+05:30

The seven ways to sniff out if your partner is true to you.

Washington, Oct 25 (ANI):

Not sure if your partner is true to you?

Well, then here are a few signs

that may help sniff out whether he/she is lying or not.

Here are seven ways to identify a liar, reports FoxNews.

1. Consider the person's recall:

Liars never forget what they have to say ,

but they may stumble when telling a tale by making contradicting statements. They're also eager to change the subject.

2. Observe the person's overall body language:

Liars can look ill at ease, fiddling with their hair, stroking their throat, or rubbing their eyes. With their body often turned away from you,

you may notice hand or leg fidgeting. Liars also have trouble swallowing and may shake their heads after a point has been made.

When the subject finally gets changed, they appear happier and more comfortable, maybe laughing nervously.

3.Take notice of any defensiveness:

Liars will often take offence to any indication that they're under suspicion. They're likely to throw any accusations you throw at them back at you.

They will also talk too much,

feeling the need to over-explain themselves.

4. Home in on facial expressions:

Liars fail to control their micro-expressions.

While fibbing, you may notice nervous twitching.

Their hand may be covering or touching their face.

People also tend to touch the mouth when feeling guilty or anxious.

They're particularly good with fake smiles.

5. Don't overlook the Pinocchio reaction:

When a human tells a lie, extra blood gets pumped through the body

and the nose swells by a fraction of millimeter.

Liars may subsequently touch the tip of their nose unconsciously.

6. Concentrate on the eyes:

A liar has a troubled brow and downcast or darting eyes.

They have trouble directly engaging your gaze.

They also give you eye-accessing clues.

If the person is telling you the truth, he'll look up and to the left since that's the side of the brain we use for recalling information.

If she's lying, she'll look up and to the right,

which is the creative side of the brain, because she's mentally constructing something that hasn't happened.

7. Note the person's voice:

The higher the stakes are, the more the liar has a fear of getting caught.

With this, the liar has a harder time controlling his body language or her voice. The pitch or rate of the speech may change,

with the individual giving a lot of "umms" and "ahhs."

Often, a liar will appear stilted and monotone.

Answers may seem rehearsed.

Truth OF LIFE

2008-10-30T14:35:00.001+05:30

Woman

A store that sells husbands has just opened in Ottawa where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is comprised of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?"

So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love, kids.

The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.

"Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"

The fourth floor sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.

"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak. "Oh, mercy me! But just think. What must be awaiting me further on?"

So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,789,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping Husband Mart and have a nice day!

First love lost

2008-10-28T13:53:00.001+05:30

I will not say that he was the object of my first affections, for that would be a lie. I have been feeling passionate about people since I was very, very young. Younger probably than most people. But I deny giving those feelings the title of love.

This may seem unfair to those who don’t know the difference, but those who do will agree: calling infantile crushes love is calling a dandelion a rose. There is simply no comparison.

I suppose that we all lose our first loves, as well, and that is what makes them so sweet. But the truth is, real love is something that one never truly loses: as long as we hold onto that feeling, that emotion that is love, in its first, most pure state, we have hope, and we have the promise of bright days ahead. And your first love is perhaps your most real and most true of all loves.

It took us a year and a half to work up to “I love you,” even though we’d been saying it with our eyes for almost that entire time. He thought I was “hot,” I thought he was “cute,” his friends hated me for taking him, my friends hated me for talking about him all the time, but we were in love, and damn the rest of the world.

Every single important moment with him, from first kiss, first voicing of the tremendous feeling inside, first time making love, break up, was completely perfect. In the course of three months, I ran through every single passionate emotion a human being can possess. And I think that he would tell you the same.

Finally, I made a mistake or two, and it became apparent that he had many things to do that he couldn’t do with me there loving him deeply. I do not say that bitterly; it is the truth. We are both young and ignorant, and college draws us steadily farther away. And yet, our love draws us closer and closer together.

In the days that followed the breakup, I realized that while it hurt incredibly to have to “lose” him, I had gained him as a friend, and that was more important than anything else. Years down the line, I am sure, we will end up back together, for there is much unfinished business and untapped emotions between us.

But even if that never comes to pass, he is, and will always remain, my first love as well as one of my truest friends. There is so much I have to thank him for, and I cannot, so I merely show him in my actions how much he means to me, as a human being. I give him compassion, now, instead of passion.

Love, true love, transcends all. It does not have to be passionate. It does not have to be wild, it does not have to be romantic. True love is ALL of those things, at one time or another, but it endures through all the ups and downs, adapts to all situations, and never gives up. That is what gives those who love truly the incredible hope that all others find so amazing and foolish.

But those who love are not foolish … they are, for the first time, truly alive and open to feeling all emotions that can possibly be felt by the human soul.

I am not a fool to have loved and lost, for I lost nothing, and I gained the world.

First love never die

2008-10-28T13:52:00.002+05:30

It was 1982, and we were in the 8th grade, which was the first year of high school because there was no middle school in the area where I lived at that time.

They say girls mature faster than boys. That is never more evident than in an 8th grade classroom. The girls were all about make-up and weekend plans, the boys were all about comic books and “Dungeons and Dragons.”

Charles and I had math together, and due to the seating arrangement, he was surrounded by me and two of my girlfriends. We teased Charles, pinched his cheeks, and told him how adorable he was.

He joked back, always having something witty to say, but was very shy and unsure of himself. I never gave him much thought as an actual BOY, but just as a buddy in math class.

The last day of school we all passed around yearbooks for signing. Everyone always wrote just about the same thing, which didn’t matter, it was really just the prestige of having a zillion signatures to show how popular you were.

When I gave Charles my book to sign, he kept it through the entire half hour study period, and went and sat in a corner with his back to me as he wrote.

When the bell rang and we all prepared to leave, he handed the book back and beat a hasty retreat out the door, never looking me in the eye. I wondered what he could’ve said that had taken so long to write, and expected to find a really lengthy entry. Instead, I found this:

Lisa,

You’re pretty nice,
pretty funny,
and you look great!

Charles

Okay, it wasn’t poetry, but it made me look at him in a whole new way. I found myself thinking about him a lot that summer.

When school started again, I found that he had “blossomed” into this really cool guy, and suddenly all the girls were interested. Not knowing what to do with the competition, I settled on just being his friend, hoping one day for a chance at more.

We always had at least one class together, and dated a few times our sophomore and junior years, once getting so hot and heavy in the back seat during a downpour that I would have gladly given him my virginity, which I had guarded very carefully from the other boys who had hoped to get it. Instead, he said we shouldn’t get carried away, so we opted for four hours of heavy necking instead.

The next year we each lost our virginity to other people. I wish we would have gone through with it that one rainy night, but at the time we couldn’t have known how important it would have been.

The summer before senior year we finally succumbed to the inevitable. We were attached at the hip, best friends, lovers, confidants and partners in crime.

Thirteen years later we are now happily married, and he can still make my knees weak by simply saying my name.

Although we have been through trials and tribulations during those years, some causing us to part for weeks or even a few months at a time, we always found each other again. We always knew we would be together forever.

I used to struggle with that, wondering why it was that some people searched most of their lives for their soul-mates and yet I had found mine as soon as I was of the age to realize boys weren’t “gross” anymore. It seemed too easy, and I thought for sure it would all end.

I don’t feel that way anymore. Now I just feel lucky.

Really, really lucky.

Knight In Shining Armor

2008-10-28T13:52:00.001+05:30

I had always had a strong belief that if I ever get married, it will be my choice and not my parents, since the place where I belong, parents always had their way in fixing up their children. To marry out of your own choice was looked down upon. A decision only the very few courageous take.

By the time I was thirteen and understood what love was all my friends and classmates at high school had a boyfriend to boast off. I was the odd one ” poor thing with no boyfriend”. Though it used to hurt me a lot that no one loved me and that I was an ugly duckling, it was never the be all and end all of life. Studies was always a priority for me. School gave way to university, where too all my friends were busy with their boyfriends. There were occasions when the ” ugly duckling” was proposed to by guys. But they were never to my tastes. I had always dreamt of my knight in shining armor who will sweep me off my feet and the wimps who proposed to me didn’t hold a candle to my image of my Prince Charming. After five years I graduated from the university. Parents were busy trying to fix me up with anyone who had the “right’ educational qualifications. And I was under the impression that my Prince Charming will always remain a dream.

However life was not so cruel to me, I got admission to Business Management in a college far away from home. The place was god forsaken and only the hope of a Business Management degree and a way to get away from marriage proposals that led me there. I thought I will never find even the least interesting person in that place. But life is truly unpredictable. I realised that my Prince Charming truly does exist in flesh and blood. I still remember the day when I first set my eyes on him. I had seated on the first row in class and had latched on to another girl. We became fast buddies since we shared the same room in the hostel where we stayed. We were passing comments on all the wimps that came through and by the second my dreams of finding my prince was shattering, and to my surprise the last person who entered was just the person I had dreamed off. He was quite tall, a thing I find a must in guys since me being tall I hate even taking to teeny guys. And he seated himself at the back of the class. From that second onwards life became very interesting. however he hardly took any notice of me. I had become used to it since by now being the ugly duckling was a part of life for me.

Days passed where I would just wait for one word or action from his part, just an acknowledgement that I existed. he talked to all the other girls except me. I was totally bewildered. what is in me that a person does not even like the sight of me. Then it was the time for holidays and we were planning to go home. I was never left unchaperoned so for the first time my dad came to pick me up from the college and he did the unexpected thing. He requested my dream guy to chaperone me to college and back home during vacations. That w as the ultimate insult. One hand it was great getting this guy all to myself, but pushing me down his neck if he didn’t like it was another matter. Even during our travel together we hardly talked while all our other friends had the time of their life. All we ever talked was in bits and pieces. Most of the time I was on the verge of crying. Here I had met my dream guy and he cannot even see me eye to eye. I was constantly crying to god why he had let this happen.

Finally all our friends at college planned a short trip to the beach. that was final straw. While all the other girls left to be with their boyfriends, i was left alone like usual. I was walking along the beach when i heard the familiar voice behind and god his voice is to die for, deep and authoritative, i turned round to see him behind me asking if I want company. I felt God has answered my prayers. There was no looking back after that, we talked and talked of all the misunderstandings and by the time we had to go back we were the thickest of friends.

From that day we became best friends. We used to discuss everything on earth. he told me about his past relationship and even her photo, that was ultimate for me. I couldn’t express my feelings, was always the shouldered for him to cry on. I don't know how i managed to listen to all that gory details of his past relationships without breaking down, coz i realised then i had competition and he never was mine. On reaching home I broke down inconsolably. Couldn’t express my emotions to anyone. Time flew and one year had passed. I never discussed my feelings, but i felt he was drawn closer to me. But i never did keep my hopes high for fear of getting dashed.

Then on our trip home for vacation he told the three little words for which i had waited a lifetime. We were from different religions and he said even if he had a relationship it will be with no strings attached that he will leave me once our studies are over. I was willing to grab even the tiny bit of hope, coz if i had let him go i knew i would never get him back, so i was happy with whatever little i got. i still wonder how being so adamant i agreed to a no strings attached relationship. But by the time our course finished we were too much involved, my parents were looking out in earnest for bridegrooms and neither of us had a job, so eloping was the last thing on my mind.

By the grace of god i got a job and escaped from home. He too followed suit. Finally we decided to break the news of our relationship at home. We were expecting mayhem but it was just violent outbursts from everyone. We stuck to our decision no matter what. Finally he got a job abroad.

My parents finally saw their attempts in keeping me apart was futile and so decided to get me married to him . So after 7 years of being together we got married two years before and I felt that I have been the most blessed by god. Am scared to be too happy, wonder if god will take away my happiness from me. I feel truly blessed now.

While we were friends he used to often joke that he will fix me up with some one and that my knight in shining armor will cross the seven seas and ask for my hand in marriage.
True to his words he crossed the seven seas and came to marry me. It just makes me realise that dreams too come…..

- A dreamer -

Love Means

2008-10-28T13:46:00.003+05:30

(A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on a motorcycle)

Girl: Slow down. I'm scared.

Guy: No this is fun.

Girl: No its not. Please, its to scary!

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!

Guy: Now give me a BIG hug. (Girl hugs him)

Guy: Can u take my helmet off and put it on? Its bugging me.

In the paper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on the motorcycle, but only one survived.
The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his breaks broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him, felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so she would live even though it meant he would die.

The Net of Love

2008-10-28T13:46:00.001+05:30

The boy returned home with his heart happily beating. He was tired, since he covered half of Budapest. He’s been anticipating this moment for more than 6 months when his savings will pay for his internet connection and the world will open before him. The often heard, almost slogan came into his mind: “The information superhighway will become the most heavily traveled road of the next century.”

What he felt was not quite happiness, but an emotion far more unique and noble played around his throat. He was proud to have broken out of the gray circle of dusty commonality. With the help of his computer he can even soar to places that have never before appeared on his mind’s horizon.

Ten p.m. The adventure is about to begin. He typed in his nick and passwords and in that instant it felt as though the sparks of his soul had just landed on the stage of night. He was ecstatic when he typed in the first address and the www page actually crackled onto his monitor. “This is fantastic. From now on I can be on the net as long as I want and never be bored. There are millions of pages waiting to be discovered!”

That is exactly how it was, at least for the first month or two. Then he felt that he needed something else. The holes he felt in his soul were not patched by the adventures. He was about to lay aside the magic net when he discovered something. Someone, from among those who were up to now, in the background shadows for our hero simply said: chat.

The fabric that had meant the world had once again became fully charged with excitement. It was true, he never experienced this before. He could talk with people ‘live’, who as himself, sat hunched over a plastic box filled with microchips and typed their questions and answers into tiny windows.

Time, once again, as a heartless thief had taken the fire from his eyes….that is, until suddenly a small blue square flashed. It was a girl who asked for help, and kindness over-flown from her words. It did not take much for the boy’s soul to comprehend perfect harmony. In this impersonal, yet in some ways far more personal world, two souls have touched.

The mirage of unlimited freedom had buckled his heart, into which an unexpected thought moved in: LOVE. He felt love toward someone he met only a few days before, and with whom he was able to exchange merely a few words, even those over a monitor.
Someone he’s never seen. The keyboard revealed virtually nothing, yet the girl, that sweet butterfly, gave away part of her unblemished soul with every stroke of a key to that other heart who, with increasingly concentrated purpose whispered between bit-per-second that word which for humanity became overused, schematic, yet at the same time still represents the paradise of dreams.

Why should we always organize through the cool etiquette of reality? Why does the power appear silly that combined beauty with beast, and the soul with the soulful? Could it be that two people, two such individuals who perhaps never would have met had they not been caught in the elements of modern life, could it be that they are in love with each other?

A mere few hours of in-depth conversation, but the human emotion does not recognize the lifeless combination of time and distance. Emotions refuse to allow themselves to be pressed into the mold of the everyday routine, they don’t give in to the flooding emptiness and forceful attack of lifelessness. Treacherous waters for sure, never knowing who and when will show their real face or when they will hide behind a pleasant mask. But the girl was herself. The boy felt, he knew that his net-shine can not be false, can’t be fake. They met every night spending all possible time together.

This feeling was not present elsewhere: the boy was surrounded by his internet friends, and there was the Girl but still, his soul was afraid. The echo of emptiness, the cold buzz of evil always woke him from his sweetest dreams, fragmenting peaceful moments. These two souls still found each other. Found each other in the fabric of a world-wide net and in such a fashion that would never have been possible in the real world.

The same monitor that used to be seen as the surface for boring characters of a text, at this moment came to represent Life. Real Life. The few currents of electricity, the micrometer’s worth of magic that was constructed by thoughtful, expert hands and the hundreds of kilometers of telephone cable, like some kind of a vein as a warm life supplying vein in the body, tied to each other the boy and the girl, on that stormy, and netted night.

A Boy

2008-10-28T13:31:00.001+05:30

A boy walked into a CD store
and saw a girl behind the counter.

She smiled and he thought it was the most beautiful smile he has ever seen before and wanted to kiss her right there.

He said "Uh... Yeah... Umm... I would like to buy a CD." He picked one out and gave her money for it.

"Would you like me to wrap it for you?" she asked, smiling her cute smile again.

He nodded and she went to the back.

She came back with the wrapped CD and gave it to him. He took it and walked out of the store. He went home and from then on, he went to that store everyday and bought a CD, and she wrapped it for him. He took the CD home and put it in his closet. He was still too shy to ask her out and he really wanted to but he couldn't. His mother found out about this and told him to just ask her.

So the next day, he took all his courage and went to the store. He bought a CD like he did
everyday and once again she went to the back of the store and came back with it
wrapped. He took it and when she wasn't looking, he left his phone number on the desk and ran out...

!!!RRRRRING!!!

The mother picked up the phone and said, "Hello?"

It was the girl!!! She asked for the boy and the mother started to cry and said, "You don't
know? He passed away yesterday...

“The line was quiet except for the cries of the boy's mother. Later in the day. The mother
went into the boy's room because she wanted to remember him. She thought she
would start by looking at his clothes. So she opened the closet. She was face to face with piles and piles and piles of unopened CDs. She was surprised to find all those CDs and she picked one up and sat down on the bed and she started to open one.

Inside, there was a CD and as she took it out of the wrapper, out fell a piece of paper. The
mother picked it up and started to read it.

It said: Hi... I think you are really cute. Do you wanna go out with me? Love, Kushi

The mother opened another CD...

Again there was a piece of paper. It said: Hi... I think you are really cute. Do you wanna go out with me? Love, Kushi

A Silent Love

2008-10-28T13:30:00.003+05:30

From the very Beginning, the girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"

As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"

The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......

The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.

During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart every time it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phone calls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....

The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.

A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.

When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.

She was my first love...

2008-10-28T13:30:00.001+05:30

As a Virgo, I am a dreamer. We have the potential to fall in love five or six times an hour in a crowded place. So it's not a surprise that I have searched long. All the time, in my heart, I already knew.

The wind blew her into my life about five years ago. I fell in love instantly.

She taught me how to slow down and look at what I had been missing. She showed me how to feel, not just how to touch. She showed me a world that was beyond my grasp and then walked me there, hand and hand.

I have never learned so much from such an incredible human being. We spent hours together, but it was never enough time.

Situation parted our ways for a year while I lived five hours away with a girlfriend. On a cold day, while visiting, we went swimming in the springs.

I took a nice dive into the dark part of the river. I barely made it up. I had broken my second vertebra on my spine and god and all those doctors only know what else.

All I can really remember is seeing her, wanting her beside me more than anything else in the world. That's when I truly knew she was the one.

I know what you're thinking, not particularly the best time in the world to realize it, but facing the possibility that you're actually going to die really clears things up. In a world of distractions and persuasion, it's extremely hard to see though all the bullshit to find what you are actually looking for.

For me that was love.

She stayed with me, beside me. She never cried in front of me and never showed an ounce of fear. She's a stronger person than I could ever be.

We now live together in our hometown. The years she waited, I will never forgive myself for missing. But I guess everything happens for a reason.

Each day our hearts and souls learn, experience, and grow together.

She is my best friend, my lover, my mentor, and she will always be my first and last true love.

Vacation With My Mum

2008-10-28T13:29:00.003+05:30

It was the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of high school and I was on vacation with my mother.
A beautiful boy of my age was vacationing with his family at the same hotel. He had dark hair and ice blue eyes.

On my second or third day there we began talking at the swimming pool. He was very nice and polite -- not the cocky jock I had him pegged for.

We went for a walk on the beach and talked for most of the afternoon. I discovered he was leaving the next day, so I asked if I could take his picture -- I couldn't believe this great guy and I had hit it off.

After breakfast the next morning, I found a piece of paper he had left under the door to our bungalow -- he had given me his address and phone number. He lived in New Hampshire, I in Connecticut. When you're 15, that's a long way, but at least we were a few hours' drive apart.

We began writing, the letters became more and more frequent, and soon they were love letters. In one he sent sand from the beach where we had met.

We exchanged photos of our homes and pets. And once a week we had the ecstasy of talking on the phone -- the most our parents would allow long distance.

In December he and his mom visited for a weekend so he could go to a school dance with me. It was heaven. It was the first time I slow-danced with a boy and the first time I was kissed.

We kissed several times that evening. Sometimes when he was searching for my lips I would hide my face in the crook of his neck because I was simply overwhelmed. Those kisses were amazing.

For Valentine's Day I sent him a package covered with hearts and he sent me a bracelet.

Soon the letters and phone calls waned. I started to like a boy at my school who had been flirting with me for a while. And Steve and I hadn't written or talked for a month or more.

I wrote one last letter explaining my feelings. And that was it.

Now I'm an adult in a long-term relationship wondering if marriage is something I want in my future. Every now and then I think back to Steve and how innocent and simple our love was.

You only get that once in your life.

The Good Samaritan

2008-10-28T13:29:00.001+05:30

Certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among thieves, which stripped him of his raiment, and wounded him, and departed, leaving him half dead. And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side. And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on him, and passed by on the other side. But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, and went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him. And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again, I will repay thee. Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among the thieves? And he said, He that showed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise." ~ Luke 10:30-37 ~

The busy city awoke to Monday morning, ready to face another hectic week of work and life. Like most city dwellers on such a weekday, Hannah Anderson started off on her daily trek to the office. Hannah had spent the weekend with her parents in the country, something she always did, for she was never so happy as when she returned home. The love she felt from her parents, would tide her over to the next weekend. Unlike most people, Hannah never disliked Mondays. It just meant she was one day closer to Saturday, and her parents. It was with these thoughts, that she walked down the sidewalk, on her way to work.

However, when Hannah came to the stoplight, her thoughts changed course. This day had started like most others, but somehow, something felt different. Then it came to her. Hannah looked around for the panhandler who had chosen that place as his spot. She had grown accustomed to his silent presence at the stoplight. She would greet him with a smile and drop lose change into his cup. The man would nod and look down, never saying a word. Hannah had observed his long, unkempt brown hair. She had noticed his beard reached the top of his faded blue jacket. She saw he always wore the same pair of worn sneakers - ones with duct tape wound about them, to keep the soles in place. To her horror, she had even observed he never wore socks, no matter how cold it was outside. Ever since Hannah had moved to the busy city five months ago, her pity grew for the panhandler at the stoplight.

But today, the spot where he always occupied, stood empty. Every day, without fail, he had always been there. Hannah looked at the other people that waited at the stoplight. Most of them she recognized, for they too, made the same route to work, every day. As the light turned green, Hannah saw none of them had noticed the missing member of their daily gathering. She looked at her watch. Yes, she had a little time before work. For the first time in months, Hannah did not cross the street with the others when the light turned green. Instead, she searched the side walk on either side of the stoplight. It was then, she saw a dark alley separating two tall buildings near the panhandler's spot.

By nature, Hannah was not intrepid. However, her concern for the stoplight panhandler, and her desire to not be late for work, propelled her forward in action not typical of a generally, thoughtful young woman. In her haste, though, she remembered to pray before entering.

"Safety is of the Lord," she reminded herself. She wrinkled her nose, for everything smelled of foul odors, and rotting trash. Cardboard boxes were piled up high against trash cans; a small stream of water ran down the black asphalt. Hannah slowly walked to the end of the alley.

As she turned to leave, Hannah noticed a huddled form crouched between two trash cans. She gave a sudden start, but the form did not move. It did not seem to be aware of her presence at all. Hannah took a step closer, careful not to make any noise. As dark clouds softly parted overhead, a ray of light fell upon the huddled form's face, revealing the stoplight panhandler. His eyes were closed, and his arms were wrapped around his torso. The faded jacket was no longer blue, but soaked in a dark red substance. Alarmed, Hannah knelt down beside him on the damp asphalt. Hannah bent down and put her ear up to his chest. His heart was beating, but it was very faint. This man was dying. Hannah jumped to her feet, and dashed out of the dark alley. She had to find a telephone, quickly.

No one noticed the young woman as she frantically ran down the streaked gray sidewalk, searching for a pay phone. Across the street, she spotted a secondhand bookstore. Hannah quickly crossed the street, forgetting to look before she did so. A yellow taxi screeched to a halt, narrowly missing Hannah. The driver stuck his head out and yelled at her in a language she did not understand.

"Sorry!" Hannah called back. She opened the bookstore door and ran to the counter. "May I use your phone? It's an emergency!" she hurriedly asked an old man sitting by the cash register. The old man looked up sleepily.

"Just so as it's not long distance," he replied grumpily. Hannah nodded as she grabbed the telephone receiver. Her fingers trembled as she dialed 911. To her disbelief, the number was busy.

"Please, God, make them answer!" she urgently pleaded. The old man opened his eyes again, curiously observing her anguish as one would passively watch television. Hannah's heart pounded loudly in her ears. The sound reminded her that with every passing moment, the stoplight panhandler lost more blood. "Don't let him die, God!" she prayed outloud. After what seemed to Hannah to be an eternity, a voice answered.

"This is 911 emergency. How may I help you?" asked a woman's voice. For a moment, Hannah's tongue glued to the roof of her mouth.

"Please get an ambulance to the corner of Jefferson and Madison right away! There's a man in the alley... he's lost a lot of blood!" Hannah pleaded frantically.

"Stay calm. An ambulance is on it's way," the woman's voice assured.

"Thank God!" exclaimed Hannah. The emergency dispatcher asked who she was, and then hung up when the sirens were within hearing distance. Hannah dashed out of the bookstore, heedless of the oncoming traffic, and stood at the entrance of the alley. An ambulance pulled up beside the curb, it's red lights flashing.

"Over here!" she called. Two men jumped out of the ambulance and followed Hannah down the alley. She watched as they unwound the limp arms of the stoplight panhandler.

"It's a knife wound," she heard one of the men say. When a policeman tapped Hannah on the shoulder, she jumped.

"Were you the one who called 911?" he asked.

"Yes, I was," replied Hannah, nervously.

"Did you know him?" the policeman asked, pointing at the limp form being lifted onto a stretcher.

"No."

"How did you find the body?" he asked. Hannah felt faint. The walls of the alley began to spin around her.

"I was walking..." she began. Suddenly, everything became black.

Untiring Love

2008-10-28T13:28:00.001+05:30

This is a true story that happened in Japan.

In order to renovate the house, someone in Japan tore open the wall. Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls. When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside was hammered into one of its feet. He saw this, felt pity, and at the same time he was curious. When he checked the nail, turns out, it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was first built.

What happened?

The lizard had survived in such a position for 10 years! In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind boggling. Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years without moving a single step--since its foot was nailed!

So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it had been doing, and what and how it has been eating. Later, not knowing from where it came appeared another lizard, with food in its mouth.

Ahh! He was stunned and at the same time, touched deeply. Another lizard had been feeding the stuck one for the past 10 years...

Such love, such a beautiful love! Such love happened with this tiny creature...

What can love do?

It can do wonders!

Love can do miracles!

Just think about it; one lizard had been feeding the other one
untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.

If a small creature like a lizard can love like this... just imagine how we can love if we try.

Life Together

2008-10-28T13:27:00.002+05:30

One fine day, an old couple around the age of 70, walks into a lawyer's office.
Apparently, they are there to file a divorce.

Lawyer was very puzzled, after having a chat with them, he got their story....
This couple had been quarreling all their 40 over yrs of marriage nothing ever seems to go right.

They hang on because of their children, afraid that it might affect their up-bringing. Now, all their children have already grown up, have their own family, there's nothing else the old couple have to worry about, all they wanted is to lead their own life free from all these years of unhappiness from their marriage, so both agree on a divorce....

Lawyer was having a hard time trying to get the papers done, because he felt that after 40 yrs of marriage at the age of 70, he couldnt understand why the old couple would still want a divorce..

While they were signing the papers, the wife told the husband..
"I really love u, but i really cant carry on anymore, I'm sorry.."
"Its o.k, i understand.." said the husband. Lookin at this, the lawyer suggested a dinner together, just 3 of them, wife thought, why not, since they are still gonna be friends..

At the dining table, there was a silence of awkwardness.
The first dish was roasted chicken, immediately, the old man took the drumstick for the old lady.."take this, its your favourite.."

Looking at this, the lawyer thought maybe there's still a chance, but the wife was frowning when she answer.."
This is always the problem, you always think so highly of yourself, never thought about how I feel, dont you know that i hate drumsticks?"

Little did she know that, over the years, the husband have been trying all ways to please her, little did she know that drumsticks was the husband's favourite. Little did he know that she never thought he understand her at all, little did he know that she hates drumsticks even though all he wants is the best for her.

That night, both of them couldnt sleep, toss and turn, toss and turn...after hours, the old man couldnt take it anymore, he knows that he still loves her, and he cant carry on life without her, he wants her back, he wants to tell her, he is sorry, he wanted to tell her "i love you"...

He picks up the phone, starting dialing her number....ringing never stops..he never stop dialing....

On the other side, she was sad, she couldn’t understand how come after all these years, he still doesnt understand her at all, she loves him a lot, but she just cant take it anymore....phone's ringing, she refuses to answer knowing that its him..."what's the point of talking now that its over...i have ask for it and now i wanna keep it this way, if not i will lose face.."she thought...still ringing...she have decided to pull out the cord...

Little did she remember, he have heart problems...

The next day, she received news that he had passed away...she rushed down to his apartment, saw his body, lying on the couch still holding on to the phone...he had a heart attack when he was still trying to get through her phone line....

As sad as she could be...she will have to clear his belongings...when she was looking thru the drawers, she saw this insurance policy, dated from the day they got married, with the beneficiary being her... And together in those file, there was this note...

"To my dearest wife, by the time you're reading this, I'm sure I'm no longer around, I bought this policy for you, though the amount is only $100k, I hope it will be able to help me continue my promise that i have made when we got married, I might not be around anymore, I want this amount of money to continue taking care of you, just like the way I will if I could have live longer. I want you to know I will always be around, by your side... I love you"

Tears flowed like river......

"When you love someone, let them know... You never know what will happen the next minute.... Learn to build a life together.. Learn to love each other. For who they are.. not what they are..."

Memories of My Deep Feelings

2008-10-28T13:27:00.001+05:30

I still think about her sometimes.
Her gentle kiss and gentler touch.

The way she writhed beneath me at the slightest hint of my caress.

The way she made me feel like I would never need another human being.

I even started to wonder how I would feel if she were suddenly gone. That sounds morbid, but I was just trying to be logical or something about it. I wanted to deal with the situation if there was a situation to deal with. I was just trying to confront the issues.

I'd never dealt with those feelings before and I didn't know how far they could go. What a shame our timing was so strange.

On one hand, it drove us closer, faster, and made us cherish the time we had all the more.

On the other hand, it strained our feelings and our faith in love itself.

Looking back, I can't be sure that we were meant to be together ... it felt like we were, but it also felt like we would be together forever.

Things change. Things change.

I sometimes believe there was a lesson in that relationship. I suppose there's a lesson in any good relationship, though. What's the use otherwise?

And now.

I look at my tattoo and I think about getting another one, but I almost can't bring myself to disrupt the beauty and power of the one single one I have now. The tattoo is important because we got them together.

It was an act of commitment. Or something like that. And now I can never forget. And neither can she. And there's no reason to.

And it's strange because I want to say there is nothing still there, but then I pause for a moment and realize that those feelings run too deeply.

It's weird, though ... they're deep feelings that have no real urge to be anything more than deep feelings.

They will be there forever, and never really bother me.

I cherish that thought.

First Love Gone Bad

2008-10-28T13:26:00.001+05:30

Once upon a time...

You know, I used to love telling this story. It's a good one, without doubt, full of joy and small, goofy things. And it was a powerful one, too, 'cause it was about how I fell in love for the first time and meant it.

I say was, though, because it's now ancient history. Because all that joy turned bitter and lightness became heavy. It was bad enough to make me start writing poetry.

But some stories need to be told again every now and then.

So...

Once upon a time, when I was a freshman in college, I met a girl. Actually, I'd met her the spring before at a weekend for prospective freshmen at that same college. I remember saying to myself that if I saw her again, I was going to ask her out.

I never did, really. I just wound up hanging out with her a lot, doing homework together and staying up talking. We'd still be up long after everyone had packed up and gone back to their dorm rooms.

One night, after a bad party, we went back to her room. We read stories to each other, and, somewhere around dawn, we kissed. We became a couple.

It's so funny for me to look back on all that now. We were such kids, even though we thought we were adults ready to take on the world.

We spent so much time together that we used to joke we were married, even calling each other husband and wife. Our friends thought we were weird, but we didn't care. Love like that means that you don't give a damn what anyone else thinks; it's just the two of you versus the Universe.

She was my first lover as well as my first love. She was patient with me, eased me through my hang-ups about sex. I started to enjoy my body for the first time; we slept naked, and I can still remember running my hand up and down her beautiful back, her skin like silk.

There's something about falling in love that makes you feel very young and playful. We used to read to each other, always children's stories. Every night was another chapter of Winnie the Pooh or some Dr. Suess. Sometimes we made up our own stories that were about a past history we didn't have.

We thought we were meant for each other.

It went on much longer than it should have. The cracks started to show after a year, when she became more pushy and I became more cowed. There was no more give and take, no more joking about us being married. After two years, I'd transferred to another college; we barely lasted another semester.

She called me one night and we broke up over the phone.

I see her at the weddings of mutual friends and I just heard that she broke up with the guy she started dating a few weeks after we split up. I joked with a friend that she'd call me once, in the middle of the night, as she's done a few times before. Once she called me from Scotland ("Everything here reminded me of you," she said), another time from her parents' house.

I don't have much to say to her anymore.

There's more to the story, of course. I really could go on for pages if I were allowed, telling about anniversary presents and the time we had dinner on a rooftop. I could tell you about the river rafting trip and about the time we took a bath together.

But I don't want to talk about it anymore.

Her name is Lorraine. And sometimes I still miss her.

Schoolgirl Love Story

2008-10-28T13:20:00.002+05:30

I hated the plaid.
Almost everything else about the Catholic school I’d been stuck in was all right. I could stomach the nuns and the rigid adhesion to a schedule of worship for a religion I didn’t even belong to.

I didn’t mind the fact that we started the day with prayer, ended it with mass, and somehow had time in between to fit in a religion class or two.

I just didn’t like the plaid. Red and navy blue wool plaid skirts that itched and were a perfect argument for conformity.

Like most Catholic schoolgirls, though, I found my own way to claim my individuality. Navy blue fishnets and combat boots, for example — something that made the principal glower at me and ask me to go home and change from time to time.

I also found my individuality by my academics. I was a transfer from the public schools, something that gave me a fair amount of attention from the clean-cut boys and the girls in their skirts and loafers. Most tried not to notice me.

After all — I was the “weird one”.

Even though I was a senior, all transfer students had to take a sophomore-level speech class since the public schools didn’t require it. The teacher was an aging drama queen, as loud and vivacious as you can be while retaining a nun’s composure.

David Osborn was in my class. Unlike the other trimmed-and-suited boys, he was a little shaggy, with long blonde hair that gave the teachers fits and the nuns an excuse to discuss the sins of pride and lust.

I had to get him to notice me.

We all sat in class, crammed five deep and four wide in desks made of pockmarked wood. For a Midwest school of only 150 students, this class was considered big — almost twenty.

Toting a large bag, Miss Rood came into class wearing civilian clothes and a beret.

“Today, I’m going to hand out a magazine. Pick one article and read it. Take notes. Tomorrow, you’ll give a three minute impromptu speech on the article you read.”

There was a collective groan. I had grim fantasies of giving a speech on new medical procedures to remove the pituitary or something equally as boring.

Instead, I got a Reader’s Digest knockoff with an article about Jack the Ripper. This, I thought, was sure to get some attention from the blonde boy.

The next day, I stood up in front of a freshly-scrubbed, rosy-cheeked group of plaid-clad students and described the brutality of the killings. I was happy to see the greenish cast that settled over most of the sophomores. All of them, that is, except David.

He was smiling at me.

Nebraska is cold in the winter. That cold that sort of creeps in somewhere behind your rib cage and cuts through your lungs with razor blades when it settles in.

Unlike the public school that was only blocks from my house in Norfolk, the Catholic school was three miles away — too far to walk with nothing more on your legs than a short plaid skirt. The cold made a ride home not only pleasant, but necessary.

I stood in the alcove by the front door, waiting quietly for five o’clock to roll around. My father would be coming then to pick me up in the car that had once been my grandmother’s. By four-thirty, the school was pretty deserted except for the sound of a bucket being dragged to the janitor’s closet and the grunts of the football team practicing across the road.

Maybe that’s why I turned so quickly when I heard footsteps behind me. And it’s why I was so caught off-guard when I saw him standing there, his hair frazzled around his head like a halo.

“Why are you hanging around so late?” he asked, with a voice that was one part smoke and two parts angel.

I blanked. “Waiting for a ride,” I managed to choke out, hoping he couldn’t hear how my breath had suddenly failed me. I could blame it on the cold, I thought to myself.

Slowly, he leaned against the wall and I became aware of the need to touch his hair. He looked at me for a long time before continuing. “I liked your speech today.”

The english language left me. I was reduced to a sigh and something that sounded like a grunt in stereophonic hi-fi sound.

He leaned forward and touched my arm. All of the skin there raised in goosebumps the size of chickens. “You’re really incredible,” he said, and made it sound natural. I swore that I was melting into a puddle of goo.

And he turned and walked away. I didn’t even ask him why he was still there.

Evidently, he told every single person he knew that he was conspiring to get me alone again. He told them also that he’d blown it when he was talking to me in the hallway. That he hadn’t been nearly as eloquent as he’d wanted to be.

I begged to differ.

In a school of 150, word travels fast. Notes travel faster. After english class, one was somehow dumped in my lap, though I hadn’t seen who did it.

It was his phone number.

Six months later, we were standing together in a friend’s apartment, looking out the window at the street below. It was deserted. Most of them are in Norfolk, Nebraska at two in the morning.

Behind us, our clothes were rumpled in a pile on top of some blankets that we’d thrown together over the decidedly-seventies-era brown variegated shag carpet. I mentioned that it was definitely heading into summer, because my breath didn’t leave a ring of fog on the window.

He leaned forward, blowing on the glass to leave his breath’s mist. In the condensation he wrote “I love you,” and we watched until it faded back into clear.

I left for college on a late August morning, when the chill was just starting to leave a layer of dew on the street signs every night.

Baton Rouge seemed a million miles away — another place, another life.

The phone didn’t ring. There weren’t any letters of goodbye. No tear-filled farewells at the airport before departing.

He was already gone.

His guardians had found drugs in his bedroom and had called the police. I didn’t even know where he was, and they weren’t about to tell me since they blamed me for being a bad influence. I’d sworn to them that I didn’t even know he took drugs, and they had turned away.

It had been five weeks since he’d gone.

I boarded the plane in Omaha and watched as the patchwork of farmland went from green to red while flying over Oklahoma. There wasn’t a reason to be sad, I thought. I’d find him again someday.

But I’d packed the plaid.

My Husband did.......

2008-10-28T13:20:00.001+05:30

My husband did something so wonderful for me. While we were still engaged, he found out he would have to leave the country for a business trip. We both knew it would be really difficult for us because we spent every waking hour together. The day finally came, and I happened to be at work when his flight left.

When I got back to my apartment later that evening I noticed a dozen roses on the kitchen table along with a small hand written note. Then as I went through the house doing my regular routine, I found notes everywhere. It was so wonderful, I went to grab a glass, and the note said something about how he loved sharing meals with me. On the bathroom counter there was another one that said to look up into the mirror to see the most beautiful girl in the world. Just all over, at least 20 different notes I found, even some the next day that I hadn't discovered.

It was so great and made me realize how much I loved him, and he loved me. It made the month so much easier, when I could just look back at all the notes and they would bring a smile to my face.

Marriage Proposal

2008-10-24T19:45:00.000+05:30

Dear Ms. ABCDEFGHI,

Baby, I 'v seen you yesterday while surfing on local train
platform and realized that you are the only site I was browsing for. For
long time, I have been lonely, trying to find a bug in my life and you can
be a real debugger for me now.
My life is just an uncompiled program without you, which never
produces an executable code and hence is useless. You are not only
beautiful by face but all your ActiveX controls are attractive as well.
Your smile is so delightful, which encourages me and gives
power to me equal to thousands of mainframes processing power. When you
looked at me last evening, I felt like all my program modules were running
smoothly and giving expected results. /* Which I never experienced before
*/.
With this letter, I just want to convey to you that, if we
linked together, I'll provide you all objects & libraries necessary
for a human being to live an error free life.
Also don't bother about the firewall which may be created by
our parents as I've strong hacking capabilities by which I'll ultimately
break their security

passwords and make them agree for our marriage.
I anticipate that nobody is already logged in to your database
so that my connect script will fail. And its all certain that if this
happened to me,I will crash my system beyond recovery.
Kindly interpret this letter properly and grant me all
privileges of your inbox.

Only yours,
XYZ Software Professional

WHAT DOES SHE NEED ????

2008-10-22T20:50:00.001+05:30

What every women expects in return...............

Mum and Dad were watching TV when Mum said, "I'm
tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed."

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the
next day's lunches. Rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the
freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels,
filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and
started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning. She then put some
wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and
secured a loose button. She picked up the game pieces left on the table,
put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer.
She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a
towel to dry. She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom.
She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some
cash for the excursion and pulled a text book out from hiding under the
chair She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped
the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store.. She put both near
her bag Mum then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night
Solution & age fighting moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails.
Dad called out, "I thought you were going to bed."
"I'm on my way," she said. She put some water into the dog's dish and
put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked and the patio light
was on. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside
lamps and radios, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the hamper,
and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework.
In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day,
straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her 6 most
important things to do list. She said her prayers, and visualized the accomplishment
of her goals. About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to
no one in particular. "I'm going to bed." And he did...without another thought.

Now was that supposed to be ???? most of the guys after the marriage turn blind to see all that she does. Damn you guys !!! did you every think what she needs -----SHE NEEDS YOUR LOVE, CARE AND AFFECTION IN RETURN

Make her feel special, make her feel good and make her feel warm, give her a good hug, pamper her and talk to her, spend time with her, at least you can do this in return for all that she does for you and for the whole family ..............

DESIRE OF WOMAN - WHAT SHE WANT IN MAN?~!~

2008-10-21T21:30:00.001+05:30

What I Want In A Man, Original List ... (at age 22)

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially Successful
4. A Caring Listener
5. Witty
6. In Good Shape
7. Dresses with Style
8. Appreciates the Finer Things
9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises
10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover
*******

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 32)

1. Nice Looking - preferably with hair on his head
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner at restaurant
4. Listens more than he talks
5. Laughs at my jokes at appropriate times
6. Can carry in all the groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home cooked meal
9. Remembers Birthdays and Anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week
*******

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 42)

1. Not too ugly - bald head OK
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner at McDonalds on occasion
4. Nods head at appropriate times when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers the punchlines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Usually wears shirt that covers stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat lid down
10. Shaves on most weekends
*******

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 52)

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed to appropriate length
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep while I'm emoting
5. Doesn't re-tell same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on Weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV Dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves on some weekends
*******

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 62)

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when awake (LOUDLY when asleep)
5. Doesn't forgets why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers when...

What I Want In A Man, Revised List ... (at age 72)

1. Breathing

An intelligent love letter

2008-10-20T20:37:00.001+05:30

Intelligent Lover's Love Letter

This is a love letter from a boy to a girl.... However, the girl's

father does not like him and want them to stop their

relationship...... and so... The boy wrote this letter to the girl..

he knows that the girl's father will definitely read this letter..

1 'The great love that I have for you

2 is gone, and I find my dislike for you

3 grows every day. When I see you,

4 I do not even like your face;

5 the one thing that I want to do is to

6 look at other girls. I never wanted to

7 marry you. Our last conversation

8 was very boring and has not

9 made me look forward to seeing you again.

10 You think only of yourself.

11 If we were married, I know that I would find

12 life very difficult, and I would have no

13 pleasure in living with you. I have a heart

14 to give, but it is not something that

15 I want to give to you. No one is more

16 foolish and selfish than you, and you are not

17 able to care for me and help me.

18 I sincerely want you to understand that

19 I speak the truth. You will do me a favor

20 if you think this is the end. Do not try

21 to answer this. Your letters are full of

22 things that do not interest me. You have no

23 true love for me. Good-bye! Believe me,

24 I do not care for you. Please do not think that

25 I am still your boyfriend.'

So bad!! However, before handing over the letter to the girl, the boy told the girl to 'READ BETWEEN THE LINES', meaning-only to read

1.3.5.7.9.11.13 (Odd No.'s) go read it once again but the Odd Number

lines..

Total signs of flirting

2008-10-20T20:36:00.001+05:30

*~*Guys*~*

1. She makes eye contact and smiles at you.

2. She hits you softly on the arm and laughs when you say something funny.

3. She flips her hair when she's talking to you.

4. She touches your arm when she talks to you.

5. She says, "No, I'm not telling you who I like!" with a big smile on her face

6. She asks you who you like or who you would go out with seemingly interested.

7. When you go to the movies with a bunch of your friends and she is almost always next to you.

8. She criticizes you on a girl you like.

9. You catch her staring at you.

10. She plays with your hair or tries to put make up on you.

11. Her friends outside of school and in school know about you, and says she talks about you a lot.

12. She knows your phone number and address.

13. She will try and talk, and spend time with you as much as possible

*~*Girls*~*

1. He stares at you a lot.

2. He hits you a lot. (just play hitting )

3. He uses the first thing that pops into his head to start a conversation with you

4. He yelled, "Hi!", to your mom that day she picked you up from school.

5. He blew off his buds to go see "Run Away Bride" with you cuz you
couldn't get another girl pal to go and didn't want to go alone.

6. He tries to make you laugh anyway even if he gets hurt in the process

7. His voice gets softer ("Hey, you") when ever you two talk.

8. You hung up on him. He called you back.

9. You where invited by him to a group outing.

10. He called you to talk about nothing at all.

11. He imitates your laugh. OK, you do snort sometimes. Which makes you
laugh even harder.

12. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation.

13. He sometimes stares straight into your eyes.

The success of marriage

2008-10-20T07:34:00.001+05:30

Editor: " Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible? "
Husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: " We had been to Shimla for honeymoon after marriage. Having selected the horse riding finally, we both started the ride on different horses. My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one. On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "This is your first time".

She again climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened again. This time she again kept calm and said "This is your second time" and continued.

When the horse dropped her third time, she silently took out the revolver from the purse and shot the horse dead !!

I shouted at my wife: "What did you do you psycho. You killed the poor animal. Are you crazy?"

She gave a silent look and said: "This is your first time!!!"

Husband: "That's it. We are happy ever after."

Love and Marriage explained...

2008-10-17T05:30:00.000+05:30

A student asks a teacher, 'What is love?'The teacher says, 'in order to get an answer go to the wheat field and choose the biggest
wheat and come back.

But the rule is: you can go through only once and cannot turn back to pick.'

The student went to the field, went thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but wondered....may be there will be a bigger one later.

Then he saw another bigger one... but thought may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.

Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he started to realize that the wheat were not as big as the previous ones he saw. He knew that he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.

So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand.

The teacher told him, '...this is love... you keep looking for a better one, but later you realize, you have already missed the right person....'

*'What is marriage then?' the student asked.

The teacher said, 'in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is same: you can go through only once and cannot turn back to pick.'

The student went to the corn field. This time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one medium corn that he felt was big enough. Satisfied, he came back to the teacher.

The teacher told him, 'This time you brought back a corn.... you looked for one that is just nice enough, and you had faith and belief this was the best one, .... this is marriage.'

33 Facts about Guyz

2008-10-15T19:49:00.000+05:30

33 Facts about Guyz

*really very true........ . ......... ..

Girls r surely going to read it

*Belive it or not........

1. Guys like their gadgets & bikes more than a girl.

Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.

2. Guys hate flirts.

3.When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.

4. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about .

5. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics.

6. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

7. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention.

8. When you touch a guy's heart, there's no turning back.

9. When a girl says "no", a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow". ... so true.

10. You have to tell a guy what you really want before he gets the message clearly.

11. Guys love their moms.

12. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses.

13. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.

14. You can never understand him unless you listen to him.

15. If a guy tells you he loves you once in a lifetime. He does.

16. Beware. Guys can make gossips scatter through half of the face of the earth faster than girls can.

17. Like Eve, girls are guys' weaknesses.

18. Guys are very open about themselves.

19. It's good to test a guy first before you believe him. But don't let him wait that long.

20. Guys hate it when their clothes get dirty.. Even a small dot.

21. Guys really admire girls that they like even if they're not that much pretty.

22. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice ... very true.

23. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.

24. Guys keep secrets that girls tell them.

25. Guys think too much.

26. Guys fantasies are unlimited.

27. Girls' height doesn't really matter to a guy but her weight does! ... very true.

28. Guys tend to get serious with their relationship and become too possessive. So watch out girls!!!

29. Guys are more talkative than girls are especially when the topic is about girls.

30. You can truly say that a guy has good intentions if you see him praying sometimes.

31. If a guy says you're beautiful, that guy likes you.

32. Guys hate girls who overreact.

33. Guys love you more than you love them IF they are serious in your relationships.

Doesn't this all make sense?

A Time Called Together

2008-10-14T22:30:00.001+05:30

It came to me like a ghost in the night ever so quietly. I lay there sleeping in the warmth of an ancient, old bed that had been passed down through the years in our family. It was a memory one that had been tucked away in the recesses of my mind. A memory I vowed never to forget, but somewhere through the passage of time it had faded, like so many other things I promised in my youth to remember forever. Why then this sudden resurgence of a long lost thought.

It was partially my son`s fault. It was knocked loose in the way that children have of doing with their innocence. He asked, "Dad, let`s go fishing." There was a time in my life; back when we were both young, he and I enjoyed the company of one another. Back in the days when time was a precious commodity. I looked at him with eyes that said "all right" but a heart that said I was tired.

Being a teenager of sixteen living in the nineties, he could not be fooled so easily and he said, "But if you`re tired I could call a friend." Then I said with a heavy heart, "Yeah, go ahead," minutes later I wanted to stop him and say, "Wait, I want to come with you." But I stood there frozen in time until the taillights were nothing but a distance memory. I wanted nothing more in life than to stop him not only from driving away but from growing up as well.

I wanted him young again and to be the most important thing in his life, but I could not, for time stops for no man or child. I stood there alone and thought, "in twenty-four months when he turns eighteen he will no longer be a child, but a man, and my chances will even be slimmer that he will ever ask me to go fishing again.

Just that suddenly I thought I herd laughter in the distance. I looked towards the yard and saw the ghost of a father and son playing ball, and tag, training the dog together. They were laughing and smiling, and sharing a moment in life that may never be again. That night as I went to bed there was no sweet dreams or visions of sugarplums that danced in my head. Instead there was a ghost of long times forgotten that I called yesterday, it bought with him a vision of a young boy in his teens vowing to himself that things were going to be different when he himself was a man. Then without warning the vision turned and the face I saw staring back was me. I was shocked, stunned then saddened at the thought of history, my history repeating itself. Was I too late? Had I become the man I vowed never to be?

In the early pre-hours of dawn, a time when the darkness is bought to life by the sweet chanting voice of a robin, I awoke my son from a sleep so peaceful and quiet and undauntedly asked the question, "Hey, do you want to go fishing?" With his head full of cobwebs he said, "No, I am tired." I then let him drift back to dreamland and said, "That`s all right; we will go later," and later we did. In mid-morning on a Saturday we did something centuries old that for as long as fathers and sons exist there will be a "Time Called Together."

Once the truck was loaded that morning we were on our way. Headed on a journey, not to just go fishing but to find something we had lost some-where through the years of growing up. There was a silence that morning that could only be understood between two souls searching for a way to find themselves again. How did we become so disconnected?

At one time we were a father and son who spent every waking hour together. Now in the span of three or four years something had come between us, a menace in our society called growing old. And how the two of us faced this menace would determine our connection to one another forever.

As we neared the lake, the silence was broken by my son, "I hope they`re biting." I smiled back with a smile of reassurance that my thoughts were the same. As we pulled along the lake, I got out and admired the sheer beauty of the moment. The lake was smooth as glass; a breeze gently blowing through the trees was calling an invitation to a father and son who were lost in the world rushing by them.

The first cast of the morning was elegant and sleek as the ultra thin line floated like a cobweb in the misty morning air and glided softly on the mirrored lake. We fished for hours that morning. Many strikes were felt and many fish were caught. What kind and exactly how many I can`t recall. What I do recall were the words spoken between a father and son. I remember the laughter and tears shared between two souls who cried out in the misty morning air for one another. By the time our fishing excursion was done, we had connected again. Like two broken wires that had been severed we were spliced and woven back together by common interest and love for one another. We were as one, but we were also different and that`s the way it should be.

That night, as we headed home down the dusty graveled road, a thought came to me that yes, time marches on for all of us. Then as I glanced over to my son and saw a child who use to be, I realized that a boy was disappearing from my sight forever. But in his place was growing a man I was proud to call my son.

The Thorns

2008-10-14T22:28:00.002+05:30

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her Birkenstocks as she pushed against a November gust and the florist shop door. Her life had been easy, like a spring breeze. Then in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a minor automobile accident stole her ease. During this Thanksgiving week she would have delivered a son. She grieved over her loss.

As if that weren't enough her husband's company threatened a transfer. Then her sister, whose holiday visit she coveted, called saying she could not come. What's worse, Sandra's friend infuriated her by suggesting her grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. "Had she lost a child? No--she has no idea what I'm feeling,"

Sandra shuddered. Thanksgiving? "Thankful for what?" she wondered. For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life but took that of her child?

"Good afternoon, can I help you?" The flower shop clerk's approach startled her. "Sorry," said Jenny, "I just didn't want you to think I was ignoring you."

"I....I need an arrangement."

"For Thanksgiving?"

Sandra nodded.

"Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the Thanksgiving Special." Jenny saw Sandra's curiosity and continued. "I'm convinced that flowers tell stories, that each arrangement insinuates a particular feeling. Are you looking for something that conveys gratitude this Thanksgiving?"

"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted. "Sorry, but in the last five months, everything that could go wrong has."

Sandra regretted her outburst but was surprised when Jenny said, "I have the perfect arrangement for you." The door's small bell suddenly rang.

"Barbara! Hi," Jenny said. She politely excused herself from Sandra and walked toward a small workroom. She quickly reappeared carrying a massive arrangement of greenery, bows, and long-stemmed thorny roses. Only, the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped, no flowers.

"Want this in a box?" Jenny asked. Sandra watched for Barbara's response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems and no flowers! She waited for laughter, for someone to notice the absence of flowers atop the thorny stems, but neither woman did.

"Yes, please. It's exquisite," said Barbara. "You'd think after three years of getting the special, I'd not be so moved by its significance, but it's happening again. My family will love this one. Thanks."

Sandra stared. "Why so normal a conversation about so strange an arrangement? she wondered. "Ah, said Sandra, pointing. "That lady just left with, ah....."

"Yes?"

"Well, she had no flowers!"

"Right, I cut off the flowers."

"Off?"

"Off. Yep. That's the Special. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet."

"But, why do people pay for that?" In spite of herself she chuckled."

"Do you really want to know?"

"I couldn't leave this shop without knowing. I'd think about nothing else!"

"That might be good," said Jenny. "Well," she continued, "Barbara came into the shop three years ago feeling very much like you feel today. She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had lost her father to cancer, the family business was failing, her son was into drugs, and she faced major surgery."

Top of Form

Bottom of Form

"Ouch!" said Sandra.

"That same year, I lost my husband. I assumed complete responsibility for the shop and for the first time, spent the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too great a debt to allow any travel."

"What did you do?"

"I learned to be thankful for thorns."

Sandra's eyebrows lifted. "Thorns?"

"I'm a Christian, Sandra. I've always thanked God for good things in life and I never thought to ask Him why good things happened to me? But, when bad stuff hit, did I ever ask! It took time to learn that dark times are important. I always enjoyed the 'flowers' of life but it took thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort. You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted and from His consolation we learn to comfort others."

Sandra gasped. "A friend read that passage to me and I was furious! I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God."

She started to ask Jenny to "go on" when the door's bell diverted their attention. "Hey, Phil!" shouted Jenny as a balding, rotund man entered the shop. She softly touched Sandra's arm and moved to welcome him. He tucked her under his side for a warm hug.

"I'm here for twelve thorny long-stemmed stems!" Phil laughed, heartily.

"I figured as much," said Jenny. "I've got them ready." She lifted a tissue-wrapped arrangement from the refrigerated cabinet.

"Beautiful," said Phil. "My wife will love them."

Sandra could not resist asking. "These are for your wife?"

Phil saw that Sandra's curiosity matched his when he first heard of a Thorn Bouquet.

"Do you mind me asking, "Why thorns?"

"In fact, I'm glad you asked," he said. "Four years ago my wife and I nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but we slogged through, problem by rotten problem. We rescued our marriage--our love, really. Last year at Thanksgiving I stopped in here for flowers. I must have mentioned surviving a tough process because Jenny told me that for a long time she kept a vase of rose stems--stems!-as a reminder of what she learned from "thorny" times. That was good enough for me. I took home stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific thorny situation and give thanks for what the problem taught us. I'm pretty sure this stem review is becoming a tradition."

Phil paid Jenny, thanked her again and as he left, said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"

"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life." Sandra said to Jenny.

"Well, my experience says that thorns make roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember, Sandra, Jesus wore a crown of thorns so that we might know His love. Do not resent thorns."

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident she loosened her grip on resentment. "I'll take twelve long-stemmed thorns, please."

"I hoped you would," Jenny said. "I'll have them ready in a minute. Then, every time you see them, remember to appreciate both good and hard times. We grow through both."

"Thank you. What do I owe you?"

"Nothing. Nothing but a pledge to work toward healing your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me." Jenny handed a card to Sandra. "I'll attach a card like this to your arrangement but maybe you'd like to read it first. Go ahead, read it.

"My God, I have never thanked Thee for my thorn! I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorn. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear, teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain. Show me that my tears have made my rainbow.--George Matheson"

Jenny said, "Happy Thanksgiving, Sandra," handing her the Special.

"I look forward to our knowing each other better." Sandra smiled. She turned, opened the door, and walked toward hope.

Red Marbles

2008-10-14T22:28:00.001+05:30

I was at the corner grocery store buying some early potatoes. I noticed a small boy, delicate of bone and feature, ragged but clean, hungrily apprising a basket of freshly picked green peas.

I paid for my potatoes but was also drawn to the display of fresh green peas. I am a pushover for creamed peas and new potatoes..

Pondering the peas, I couldn't help overhearing the conversation between Mr. Miller (the store owner) and the ragged boy next to me.

'Hello Barry, how are you today?'

'H'lo, Mr. Miller. Fine, thank ya. Jus' admirin' them peas. They sure look good.'

'They are good, Barry.. How's your Ma?'

'Fine. Gittin' stronger alla' time.'

'Good. Anything I can help you with?'

'No, Sir. Jus' admirin' them peas.'

'Would you like to take some home?' asked Mr. Miller.

'No, Sir. Got nuthin' to pay for 'em with.'

'Well, what have you to trade me for some of those peas?'

'All I got's my prize marble here.'

'Is that right? Let me see it' said Miller.

'Here 'tis. She's a dandy.'

'I can see that. Hmmmmm, only thing is this one is blue and I sort of go for red. Do you have a red one like this at home?' the store owner asked.

'Not zackley but almost..'

'Tell you what. Take this sack of peas home with you and next trip this way let me look at that red marble'. Mr. Miller told the boy. 'Sure will. Thanks Mr. Miller.'

Mrs. Miller, who had been standing nearby, came over to help

me. With a smile she said, 'There are two other boys like him in our community, all three are in very poor circumstances. Jim just loves to bargain with them for peas, apples, tomatoes, or whatever. When they come back with their red marbles, and they always do, he decides he doesn't like red after all and he sends them home with a bag of produce for a green marble or an orange one, when they come on their next trip to the store.'

I left the store smiling to myself, impressed with this man. A short time later I moved to Colorado , but I never forgot the story of this man, the boys, and their bartering for marbles.

Several years went by, each more rapid than the previous one. Just recently I had occasion to visit some old friends in that Idaho community and while I was there learned that Mr. Miller had died.

They were having his visitation that evening and knowing my friends wanted to go, I agreed to accompany them. Upon arrival at the mortuary we fell into line to meet the relatives of the deceased and to offer whatever words of comfort we could.

Ahead of us in line were three young men. One was in an army uniform and the other two wore nice haircuts, dark suits and white shirts...all very professional looking. They approached Mrs. Miller, standing composed and smiling by her husband's casket. Each of the young men hugged her, kissed her on the cheek, spoke briefly with her and moved on to the casket.

Top of Form

Bottom of Form

Her misty light blue eyes followed them as, one by one, each young man stopped briefly and placed his own warm hand over the cold pale hand in the casket. Each left the mortuary awkwardly, wiping his eyes.

Our turn came to meet Mrs. Miller. I told her who I was and reminded her of the story from those many years ago and what she had told me about her husband's bartering for marbles. With her eyes glistening, she took my hand and led me to the casket.

'Those three young men who just left were the boys I told you about. They just told me how they appreciated the things Jim 'traded' them. Now, at last, when Jim could not change his mind about color or size....they came to pay their debt.'

'We've never had a great deal of the wealth of this world,' she confided, 'but right now, Jim would consider himself the richest man in Idaho '

With loving gentleness she lifted the lifeless fingers of her deceased husband. Resting underneath were three exquisitely shined red marbles.

The Moral : We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds. Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath..

Today I wish you a day of ordinary miracles ~ A fresh pot of coffee you didn't make yourself...An unexpected phone call from an old friend...Green stoplights on your way to work....The fastest line at the grocery store...A good sing-along song on the radio...Your keys found right where you left them.

IT'S NOT WHAT YOU GATHER, BUT WHAT YOU SCATTER THAT TELLS WHAT KIND OF LIFE YOU HAVE LIVED -- AND THAT IS WHY PEOPLE LIKE JESUS AND BUDDHA AND MAHAVEERA AND MANY OTHER PHILOSOPHERS SAID - GIVE AND IT SHALL BE GIVEN BACK TO YOU PRESSED DOWN AND SHAKEN TOGETHER THREE TIMES OVER. ITS ONLY WHAT YOU GIVE OUT IN PLENTY THAT COMES BACK TO YOU - GIVE HATE AND IT COMES BACK IN MANY FORMS NOT JUST HATE, GIVE LOVE AND GIVE OF YOURSELF AND SEE WHAT BLOOMS IN YOUR LIFE.

I Kept My Promise

2008-10-14T22:27:00.001+05:30

I stood outside the door and paced like a lion in a cage. I knew what 1 had to do. She was my friend, and she needed me. Fearful or not. I had to go inside. Opening the door. I was greeted by the smell of death. I made good on my word. I walked inside to visit my friend at her new living quarters. The place was called a nursing home.

Standing barely 5 feet tall. she was the epitome of courage. Her husband died at an early age, leaving her to raise her sons and run their ranch alone. Years of riding horses and working cattle riddled her body with aches and pains. In her 70s. she could no longer live alone. With her health falling. she knew what lay ahead - the nursing home. She hated the idea in the worst way. I asked her once, why? She said, because. nursing homes are where old people go to die.'

Before she left her home. I made a promise to her that I would come to visit her every week. She smiled and found comfort in my words. After she left. a week came and went, and I never made it up to see her. I was too busy. 1 told myself. I will next week. Three weeks came and went before I finally found the courage to keep my word. I stood outside the nursing home pacing trying to find a good excuse to tell her why I never made it up to see her.

With no excuse in mind, I walked into the nursing home. I had to be honest with her. The halls were lined with people in wheelchairs, heads hung low. some sleeping. some crying. A few looked up as I walked past and reached out to touch me. The smell was overwhelming. I had a hard time picturing my friend In a place like this, I found her room and knocked on her door. I walked Inside and found her sitting on her bed: She started smiling when she saw me. The smile quickly turned to a scowl. She asked in a sharp tone. "Where have you been?"

It was then the truth was revealed.. I told her I was hiding. "I hate this place as much as you do, I said.

A smile came back across her face. She told me to sit. and I did. She then began to tell me about life in the nursing home. The food. she said, is not like home cooking. They brought her bed from home. Still It didn't feel the same.

Top of Form

"I feel so out of place here,- she said.. "I Just want to go back home. People act funny when they come up here to visit me. They treat me like 1 am helpless because I am in here. and I am not."

After an hour of chatting, she got out her Scrabble board. We played three games that afternoon. It was almost like old times back at her home, minus the chocolate cake with cherries she always made for us. It was getting late, and I had to get going. I walked over and gave her a hug. I then stood back and told her I would see her next week and to keep the Scrabble board handy. I made it to the door and stopped and looked back at her sitting on her bed. She was crying I asked her what was wrong. She wiped her eyes and told me she was scared. I said. "Of what?- She whispered of becoming lonely and forgotten. I walked back over and hugged her once again. I grabbed her hand and squeezed It tight. I sat by her side on the bed holding her hand and letting her know someone cared while she had a good cry. She walked me out to the front door of the home. As I walked outside, I was greeted by fresh air once again. The birds were singing. and life was good. I then turned back toward the nursing home. My friend stood by the door. She was waving goodbye. I turned and waved back.

In the year to follow, my friend developed Alzheimer's disease and soon forgot who I was. I kept my promise and continued to visit. Whether she could remember me or not made no difference. I remembered her, and I always will. I remembered her as my friend, a great scrabble player and a cowgirl. I also remembered her as one of the thousands of elderly who live in nursing homes across the nation, scared of becoming lonely and forgotten.

Real Love Knows No Boundaries

2008-10-14T22:26:00.000+05:30

They are but two simple words that are easily spoken. I have heard them over and over again in my mind for the past eight months. I struggle each day to find the courage to speak these words out loud. Each time that I have tried, a lump appears in my throat, my eyes get misty, and all that I can do is barely whisper the words "She's gone."

Eight months ago, I lost the best friend I ever had to cancer. Her passing left a void in my life that I have yet to fill. It all started some 14 years ago. Something was lacking in my life.. I was married and had two children, but it wasn't enough. It was an ad in the paper that caught my eye and brought us together. I answered it the same day I read it. She was very young when we met. She was friendly and kind, and we took to each other right off. I wanted her more than anything else in the world. There was just one problem though: What about the wife and kids? I had them to think about. I could not keep something like her a secret, could I?

I started to walk away from her and forget the whole notion. I was just about to open the door when she grabbed me by my pant leg and started pulling and biting. I then stopped and picked her up. Looking into those big brown eyes I knew this Springer spaniel was going home with me.

It was a new experience for us all-the wife, children and Norma, the new puppy. Through the years, we learned from each other. At times, I lost track on who was really training who. As a dog, she taught me about compassion and patience. As a friend, she taught me about love. The kind of love that is unconditional. The kind that makes you sacrifice more than you thought you could for anyone person or animal. It was her human characteristics that really made her shine. Without a doubt, this dog had more compassion than some of my closest human friends. The week after, my dad's death, I walked out to her kennel and let her out to play some fetch. I was feeling pretty low and thought this might cheer me up. When I threw the training dummy, she brought it back just like she had been trained. Dropping it at my feet, she waited. I bent down to pick it up. Then she did something very unusual for her. She jumped up at me. I stopped and scolded her. Seeing the hurt in her eyes, I dropped to one knee and began to say I was sorry. Norma then jumped up again.

This time, she put her paws on my shoulders and rested her head there, as well. I brushed her off and said, "You goofy dog." She repeated the motion. This time, I did not brush her off. This time, I embraced the hug she offered and said thank you. We shared many moments like that during our time together. Norma could always sense when I needed a friend.

I think I marveled most at the way she saw the world. We have two cats in our house; one is a calico named Shak, and the other is Socks. Although she was friends with both, Norma developed a special bond with Shak. In the winter time, I always Brought Norma in from her kennel and she'd sleep in the laundry room. One morning, I awoke to find her sleeping there, curled up in a ball with her paws gently wrapped around Shak, who was sound asleep. What lessons the world could learn from our four legged friends if only we paid more attention.

Top of Form

Two years ago, she was diagnosed with cancer, and the vet did surgery. The vet excised what she could, but she couldn't get it all. The vet told me Norma might live a year if she is lucky.

Almost a year later, she developed a cough. The cancer had spread to her lungs. On Jan. 25, one day after her 14th birthday, I took Norma to the vet for the last time. We spent the better part of the day together. Just before we left, Norma came over to the chair in the living room.

Putting her paws up on my lap, she tried to getup. She was too ill, and I had to help her. In typical Norma fashion, she put her paws around my neck and rested her head on my shoulder. Then, she let out with a deep sigh. I wish I could tell you that I hugged her, and held her, and told her it was going to be all right, but I can't. Truth is, I cried like a baby for the better part of an hour. I was searching for the courage to finish what needed to be done. I hated myself in the worst way for what I was about to do. Why must I be judge and jury? I loved her the most, I cared for her the most, why me? Then it hit me, the answer, and when it did, I felt ashamed. Instead of asking myself "why me?" I should have been asking "why not me?" The courage I was lacking then suddenly swelled up inside of me. I kissed her and hugged her, and told her it was time. I took her to the vet that afternoon not as a pet owner, or a guy who had a hunting dog. I took her down there as my friend. After the shot was given, I held her in my lap. It was then I gave her one last command. I told her to hunt. With that spoken, she was finally set free. Then, she slowly closed her eyes and went to sleep forever.

Death has a way of affecting my mind for a while, and I seem forever falling short of finding a way to take it all in and make sense of it. That evening, I walked outside on my back porch and watched the day give way to the night. As the evening star appeared, I did something I hadn't done since I was a kid. I made a wish. The only difference between then and now was that I was wishing for something I really didn't want, because it wasn't really right to wish for things like that. But I did any way, and I think you know what I wished for.

Walking back inside the house, Shak the calico cat wandered from room to room. It seemed that she was looking for something or maybe someone. Being a pet owner, one thing I have learned through the years is that love knows no boundaries - two-legged, four-legged, or those that fly.

When love comes from the heart, it is felt.

Cherishing You: Falling in Love with Yourself

2008-10-14T07:01:00.001+05:30

Many people, in seeking out love, tend to look outward rather than inward. Yet falling in love with yourself can be just as wonderful an experience as falling in love with someone else. While the idea of falling in love with ourselves may be perceived as conceited or selfish, choosing to fall in love with who you are is a powerful act of self-love.

When you fall in love with yourself, you can’t help but experience a wonderful sense of discovery. You begin to look at yourself again through fresh eyes, becoming more attentive to the little details that make you so unique. Once you discover how much there is about you to fall in love with, you can’t help but want to treat yourself as lovingly and respectfully as you would treat anyone who is special to you. You start to give to yourself more because you become more attentive to your own needs and desires.

Choosing to fall in love with yourself is a very personal process that takes time. There is no magic wand you can wave to make this just happen. But there is the magic of your intention and the power of your actions, whether you are taking the time to do the activities you like, speaking to and treating yourself with respect, taking inventory of all your wonderful qualities and accomplishments, or nurturing yourself with plenty of rest and self-care. When you fall in love with yourself, you begin to see yourself more positively, appreciate your unique outlook on life, and treat yourself in a more nurturing way. In loving yourself, you are acknowledging that you are special and deserving of love. Best of all, you are giving yourself one of the greatest gifts you have to give another. You are giving yourself the gift of your love.

a short story

2008-10-14T07:00:00.001+05:30

A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young woman sees her neighbor hang the wash outside.

That laundry is not very clean, she said, she doesn't know how to
wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap.

Her husband looked on, but remained silent. Every time her neighbor
would hang her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.

About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean
wash on the line and said to her husband: "Look! She has learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this."

The husband said: "I got up early this morning and cleaned our
windows!"

And so it is with life: "What we see when watching others depends on the purity of the window through which we look. Before we give any criticism, it might be a good idea to check our state of mind and ask ourselves if we are ready to see the good rather than to be looking for something in the person we are about to judge.

Newton`s Way Of Romance

2008-10-14T06:51:00.001+05:30

Universal law:
"Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transferred from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money."

First Law:
"A Boy in love with A Girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or unless any external agent (brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy."

Second Law:
" The rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance."

Third Law:
"The force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while using her sandals."

7 ways to Identify a Liar

2008-10-14T06:42:00.000+05:30

The seven ways to sniff out if your partner is true to you

Washington, Oct 10 (ANI): Not sure if your partner is true to you? Well, then here are a few signs that may help sniff out whether he/she is lying or not.

Here are seven ways to identify a liar, reports FoxNews.

1. Consider the person's recall: Liars never forget what they have to say but they may stumble when telling a tale by making contradicting statements. They're also eager to change the subject.

2. Observe the person's overall body language: Liars can look ill at ease, fiddling with their hair, stroking their throat, or rubbing their eyes. With their body often turned away from you, you may notice hand or leg fidgeting. Liars also have trouble swallowing and may shake their heads after a point has been made. When the subject finally gets changed, they appear happier and more comfortable, maybe laughing nervously.

3.Take notice of any defensiveness: Liars will often take offence to any indication that they're under suspicion. They're likely to throw any accusations you throw at them back at you. They will also talk too much, feeling the need to over-explain themselves.

4. Home in on facial expressions: Liars fail to control their micro-expressions. While fibbing, you may notice nervous twitching. Their hand may be covering or touching their face. People also tend to touch the mouth when feeling guilty or anxious. They're particularly good with fake smiles.

5. Don't overlook the Pinocchio reaction: When a human tells a lie, extra blood gets pumped through the body and the nose swells by a fraction of millimeter. Liars may subsequently touch the tip of their nose unconsciously.

6. Concentrate on the eyes: A liar has a troubled brow and downcast or darting eyes. They have trouble directly engaging your gaze. They also give you eye-accessing clues. If the person is telling you the truth, he'll look up and to the left since that's the side of the brain we use for recalling information. If she's lying, she'll look up and to the right, which is the creative side of the brain, because she's mentally constructing something that hasn't happened.

7. Note the person's voice: The higher the stakes are, the more the liar has a fear of getting caught. With this, the liar has a harder time controlling his body language or her voice. The pitch or rate of the speech may change, with the individual giving a lot of "umms" and "ahhs." Often, a liar will appear stilted and monotone. Answers may seem rehearsed. (ANI)

Calling It Quits; Late-Life Divorce and Starting Over Part III

2008-10-12T11:15:00.001+05:30

I asked all the respondents the usual questions about how long the marriage had lasted and what role each partner played within it. Then I let them tell me how and why they came to believe divorce was their only option. I also asked about life after divorce and whether or not it had turned out to be what they hoped for. In general, my findings supported the AARP survey in that the greater percentage of divorces among the long-married are initiated by women. Most of them stressed the positive and told me they were "pleased, "satisfied,' or "downright happy" with their lives. The men, many of whom called themselves "the dumped," "the duped," or "the abandoned,' are for the most part learning "to adjust, "to accommodate," "to get along.'

One man who coped better than most is the eighty-three-year-old whose wife of fifty-three years tossed him out. Calling her the "dumper and himself the "dumpee,' he decided that, having had a woman look after him all his life, he needed to find a new one. He remembered how the cruises he had taken as a married man were filled with single women, all seemingly on the lookout for a new man. It took three cruises, all of which "exhausted' him (he said euphemistically), until he found "a good-looking sixty-year-old who doesn't mind doing my laundry. His ex-wife says she is happy for him, as she fills her days with part-time volunteer work, plays bridge with friends, and dances in the evening with men her age whom she meets in church groups and at senior centers. What she likes best about her single life is that she has male companionship when she wants it but at the end of the evening she goes home to her own bed and they depart for theirs. "I'll never pickup a mans socks again,' she vows.

Divorce is different for the rich and famous. Here I found the largest categories of men who initiated divorce and women who are sad and sometimes angry because their husbands have left them for "trophy wives." A Jungian analyst told me she describes these men as afflicted with "CEO-itis. All their lives they have been taken care of by wives, secretaries, and various assistants who fulfill their every need and desire. They are imbued with a sense of entitlement, that they can have and should be given everything they want and as soon as they want it. An English man described himself as a "serial marryer,' who likes his wives in their twenties and wants to dump them as soon as they reach thirty because "they get broody and want babies.' That, he said, would interrupt their concentration on him. Another told me to think of a man like himself (chief financial officer of an international corporation* in a way that his several wives had never accepted, as a "prize stud bull." It was his "obligation to service as many cows" as he could.

Throughout the book, I have used two different forms to tell the stories. One is the composite, in which I create a fictional person to stand for the cluster of persons whose stories are so similar that one can almost stand for them all. The second is the case study, where one couple's experience either provides a blueprint for what causes a marriage to end or else is so unusual that it needs to be told separately. Because I promised everyone who talked to me confidentiality, I have disguised their identities by changing their names and sometimes their professions and places of residence. All the information contained in this book is the truth as they told it to me, but I have created fictional personae to protect their privacy.

I don t know how many answers I've provided to the question of why there is so much late divorce throughout the world, but I have certainly raised a lot of questions. There are the obvious reasons, such as the fact that people are living longer and healthier lives and many have more disposable income. It is only natural that they change and even more natural that they don t always change at the same time as their spouse: he may be ready for retirement and she may be deeply involved with a career or hobby, she may want to move to a retirement community and he might not want to leave the old neighborhood. One or the other becomes bored or disenchanted with the old, wrinkled person sitting across the dinner table and might want someone new and exciting.

Margaret Mead thought every woman needs three husbands: one for youthful sex, one for security as she raises her children, and one for the joyful companionship of old age. Perhaps this is what people want today and why so much divorce is happening. The feminist revolution that started in the 1970s got women out of the kitchen and into the workforce, where they learned to be self-sufficient and discovered that they liked it. There are still many women today who are financially dependent on the man they married a long time ago, but it is surprising how many of them are willing to risk the uncertainty of life on their own just to get away from the "control" (another big word often cited in divorces) their husbands exerted.

I use the phrase "social earthquake' to describe what is happening today It was coined by the revered American feminist Elizabeth Cady Stanton to describe a sensational adultery scandal of her time that led to a late-nineteenth-century divorce, and it remains resonant here in the twenty-first. Our contemporaries have tried to name the phenomenon; British writer Margaret Drabble deems life after divorce "the Third Age. Drabbles heroine thinks, in the novel The Seven Sisters, "Our dependents have died or matured. For good or ill, we are free."

A woman in New Zealand put it more bluntly when she told a newspaper interviewer that she looked at her husband one day after her children had left home and thought, "I don't want to be here. I don't need you, and I really don't like you.

Could that be the simplest and most direct answer to all the questions about late-life divorce? We need to find out, and I hope this book will be a good way to get the dialogue going.

Calling It Quits; Late-Life Divorce and Starting Over : Part II

2008-10-12T11:14:00.001+05:30

That evening, the agent who represents me in Europe phoned and in the course of conversation I told her about this book about late-life divorce I intended to write. She called the phenomenon "the European epidemic" and surprised me by saying that it was rampant in France and Germany. Germany, perhaps, I replied, but France? Didn't husbands and wives just go their separate ways, as all the movies and books portrayed French marriage, and didn't they stay married just to keep the money in the family? No longer, the agent said. European divorce statistics are fast catching up to those in the rest of the world. Even China was jumping on the bandwagon.

In the spring and summer of 2005 I had a chance to see for myself how common late-life divorce was becoming when I went to Australia and New Zealand to lecture, participate in writers festivals, and be a writer-in-residence at a Sydney university. People everywhere asked what my new book would be, and when I told them, so many came forward to tell me their stories that I realized it was truly a worldwide phenomenon.

But how, I wondered, would I tell these many different stories? As I am neither a sociologist nor a cultural anthropologist, I knew from the beginning that the book would not be a statistical survey or a scientific treatise. What I thought the book needed to be, and what I wanted it to be, and what it has become, is a collection of stories told to me by husbands and wives who chose to end long marriages, as well as the stories of adult children of late-life divorce, who told me how their parents' breakups affected them. My main objective was to let real people talk so that others might find in their stories something helpful - utility (guidance on how to divorce if they believed they had no other option), information (about the financial reality they would have to face after divorce, for example), or comfort (ways to live a satisfying life as a single after many years of being part of a couple).

I set out to collect as many stories as people wanted to tell me and to let them fall naturally into whatever categories or patterns they assumed. The AARP survey had 1,147 respondents, and initially I was hoping to amass about one tenth that number, or approximately 150 case histories. I began to interview in October 2004, and to my amazement, by the time I finished writing in early 2006, I had interviewed 126 men, 1S4 women, and 84 adult children. I continued to interview people until the writing was finished, for I learned something new with every interview and I wanted to incorporate everything I thought would be useful, helpful, and informative for those already divorced or for those contemplating it.

I found my subjects by word of mouth, as people learned that I was writing this book and one person told another, who had a friend, who told another friend, and so on. When I tried to describe my research methods, my sociologist friends told me I was using the well-respected technique of "snowball sampling,' in which information accretes to a point where it can be interpreted to give legitimate findings. Almost two thirds of my interviewees found me and volunteered to talk. In general, women were more open and eager, whereas men were not only hesitant about being interviewed, they were also more guarded and circumspect about what they wanted to tell me. Whenever possible, I tried to interview both parties to the divorce, but frequently - with about a third of the ex-couples - one or the other was so angry and bitter that he or she would threaten me with the dire things that would happen if I dared to contact the ex-spouse. I honored the request and did not initiate contact, but if the ex got in touch with me. then I conducted an interview. All the while I was interviewing, I kept remembering what a man in Switzerland told me when his wife ended their thirty-seven-year marriage: "There are five truths in my divorce: mine, my wife's, and our three children's. That was why I thought it was so important to get all sides of the story whenever I could, and why I also interviewed the adult children of divorced parents. It was interesting to me to explore just how the parental divorce affected the adult children's relationships and their attitudes toward marriage.

My respondents include straight, gay. and lesbian couples. They came from many social classes, from (to use some simplistic terms here) 'high society.' business elites (CEOs), and high-level politicians, to the stable managerial and working classes, to those I call the working poor, who hold service jobs or irregular employment. I also talked to divorce lawyers, mediators, and judges who specialize in what is euphemistically known as 'family law. To my regret, my study population is mostly white: I had too few Hispanic and African and Asian American respondents to relate their stories as being representative of a larger group.

Most of my interviews were conducted by telephone because my respondents lived throughout the world and the time and money needed for travel precluded face-to-face conversations. Initially I was disappointed that I would not have in-person interviews with everyone, but overall, when I compared personal interviews with those on the telephone, I found that the phone provided exactly the right degree of separation and the perfect buffer between people who were often hurt, angry, or confused and the stranger at the other end to whom they were confiding such intimate details of their lives.

Calling It Quits; Late-Life Divorce and Starting Over : Part I

2008-10-12T11:13:00.000+05:30

This is the first book to reveal the truth about the exploding phenomenon of late-life divorce, which has resulted in a seismic shift in modern relationships. Now, in a finger-on-the-pulse examination of this growing trend, Deirdre Bair, New York Times bestselling author and winner of the National Book Award, explores the many reasons why older, long-married couples break up. Having conducted nearly four hundred interviews with ex-wives, ex-husbands, and their adult children, Bair reveals some of the surprising motivations that lead to these drastic late-life splits, as well as the surprising turns life takes for all concerned after the divorce is final.

Although the standard assumption is that husbands trade in their spouses for younger trophy wives, Bair has found that, most often, women initiate these divorces because they want the freedom to control how they will live the rest of their lives. The realization may appear to happen suddenly, but Bair shows how it often takes many years and much careful planning before the ultimate "Eureka!" moment. We see that for one woman it happened when she asked her husband to help in the kitchen and he shouted angrily for her to keep her voice down so he could hear the television. For one couple, the decision to end their marriage arrived when the wife condemned their unmarried adult daughter for having a baby and her husband sided with the daughter, leading both partners to realize that they had never had anything in common. One woman in her eighties, married for fifty-three years, woke up after transplant surgery and announced to her husband: "I don't know how many years I have left, but I do know I don't want to spend them with you."

Bair describes current trends in late-life divorece, including the growing use of "mediators," whom many couples see as lower-cost alternatives to lawyers. She also provides fascinating examples of how people cope in the years after divorce. Divorce changes older peoples' sex lives in surprising ways, and Bair is candid in discussing what really goes on in their bedrooms. She presents the stories of those who elect to stay single after divorce, of others who remarry immediately, and of those who are puzzled to find themselves divorcing yet again. As Bair's subjects rebuild their lives, the reader wills see new possibilities for living in "the third age," and may be inspired to realize that there is indeed life after divorce and plenty of it.

Important, eye-opening, and truly groundbreaking, Calling It Quits is essential reading for an entire generation and its children, and an acclaimed author's most personal and most universal work.

Not every writer finds inspiration for a new book in a dentists office on a sweltering summer day. I was a nervous wreck waiting for what I knew would be the bad news that I needed an implant, and so I thought I'd divert myself by reading magazines. There wasn't much on the table and most of it - about hot rods, golf, raising babies - was old and tattered, but at the bottom of the pile I spied what I thought was the best of a bad lot, the magazine for oldsters sponsored by AARP (American Association of Retired Persons).

The cover was like all its others, featuring a photo of a woman who didn't look old enough to be on it (Cybill Shepherd this time), but it was the blurb for one of the articles that caught my attention: "The New Divorce: Why More Women Than Ever Are Calling It Quits 'and Why Men Don t See It Coming).' 'This was certainly intriguing, because my own divorce happened after forty-three years of marriage, and in the years since I had been told countless stories (whether I wanted to hear them or not) by men and women who had been married a very long time but who had, for whatever the reason, decided to live the next stage of their lives as a single.

Some gave the usual reasons: "He traded me in for a trophy wife younger than our daughter or "We had nothing in common anymore" or "I couldn't take his (fill in the blank - gambling, drinking, womanizing].' But I also heard a lot of stories from men and women who I thought lived comfortable, contented lives in financially secure marriages and who said that they didn't care what the future might hold, that they divorced because they could not go on living the same old life in the same old rut with the same old boring person. I heard a lot of remarks that all came down to one word: freedom. Women - especially those women who had jobs outside the home - were tired of taking care of husband, house, and children. Men who divorced told me they, too, were tired of the same old daily grind of working to support wives who did not "appreciate them and children who did not "respect' them. Another remark I heard often from both was "Its my time and if I don t take it now, I never will.

So I was naturally intrigued when I saw that the magazines story was about a survey that AARP had commissioned of 1,147 people aged forty to seventy-nine, all of whom divorced between their forties and sixties. The reporter called it "groundbreaking" because it put the lie to the usual assumptions, that men leave and women seldom find love and/or companionship ever again. The study found that women initiated the divorce more often than men, and if they wanted new love or companionship, they were usually able, eventually, to find it.

The article corresponded in large part to the stories I had been hearing from friends, associates in publishing and academe, and acquaintances everywhere from Paris to Zurich to Sydney, where the research for my biographies took me. People rushed to tell me their stories while I kept mostly silent, probably because I am a curious anomaly: a biographer who writes the intimate details of other peoples lives and tells few of her own. To cover my reticence, I joked, asking if there was something in the drinking water that was making late divorce the worldwide phenomenon it seemed to be.

Some of the stories I heard fell into the same patterns as those in the AARP survey, but most had original and interesting twists. I knew several couples in their eighties who divorced after sixty years of marriage. I knew women who celebrated their fifty-year golden anniversaries by announcing that they would be divorcing within the coming year. One woman had been married for fifty-three years, had never worked outside her home, had no clear idea of how she would survive financially, and had just undergone an organ transplant. She told me, "I don't know how many years have left, I just know I don't want to live them with him!" Her ex-husband said he "didn't know what hit him" when she walked out because he always thought "everything was just fine. We never fought, we never raised our voices.' And I knew high-level businessmen approaching retirement who told me they were 'frightened' into divorcing because, even though their wives fulfilled every life style-supporting role they needed, from giving exquisite dinner parties to entertaining clients to raising the children alone so they could concentrate on work, there was no intimacy between them in their showcase "McMansion' homes. One of these men said he "could not stand the loneliness any longer, especially now that he and his wife would be together "24/7."

I thought about these stories in the dentists office. Yes, I did need an implant, and we did set up the necessary appoint men is, but the dentist was puzzled that I seemed more interested in telling him I needed to filch his AARP magazine and beat a hasty exit than in his description of the dire procedures that awaited me. All I could think of was how fast could I get out of his chair and onto the phone with my agent in New York. I had barely begun to explore with her the possibility of turning the intriguing stories I had been hearing into a book when she burst in excitedly to tell me about the "late divorces' that were almost an epidemic among the "chattering classes,' as the publishing and writing communities are called. We talked about the writer whose wife of thirty-seven years grew tired of washing his socks - yes, washing his socks, not typing his pages - and left him to fend for himself in a Brooklyn loft while she went to Cape Cod "to find herself and write her own book, ~a self-help for other women who call it quits.' There was the very rich "lady poet' (she styled herself that way) whose husband of twenty-nine years (and a figure of respect in his own right but in a different line of work) got tired of holding her two tiny dogs at readings in obscure storefront locations, especially after they became old and incontinent. He left her to go and live in a studio apartment in a poorer part of Manhattan, where he watched television sports and drank beer from the bottle in solitary splendor at the end of his busy workday.

After 50 years.....

2008-10-12T07:22:00.001+05:30

A man and his wife were celebrating 50 years together.

Their three kids, all very successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honour.

' Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad, ' gushed son number one .
'Sorry I ' m running late.
I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient,
you know how it is, and didn ' t have time to get you a gift. '

' Not to worry, ' said the father.
'The important thing is that we ' re all together today. '

Son number two arrived and announced,
'You and Mom look great, Dad.
I just flew in from Los Angeles between depositions
and didn ' t have time to shop for you. '

' It ' s nothing, ' said the father, ' We ' re glad you were able to come. '

Just then the daughter arrived, ' Hello and happy anniversary!
I ' m sorry, but my boss is sending me out of town
and I was really busy packing
so I didn ' t have time to get you anything. '

After they had finished dessert, the father said,
'There ' s something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long time.
You see, we were very poor.
Despite this, we were able to send each of you to college.
Throughout the years your mother and I knew
that we loved each other very much,
but we just never found the time to get married. '

The three children gasped and all said, ' You mean we ' re bastards? '

' Yes, ' said the father.
'And cheap ones too. '

Real love knows no boundaries

2008-10-11T14:35:00.001+05:30

Two years ago, she was diagnosed with cancer, and the vet did surgery. The vet excised what she could, but she couldn't get it all. The vet told me Norma might live a year if she is lucky.

a husband's grief

2008-10-11T14:19:00.001+05:30

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother
and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to
another man kneeling at a grave.

The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why
did you have to die?"

The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere
with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than
I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A
parent?"

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's
first husband."

What a Woman Wants in a Man Love Humor?

2008-10-11T14:12:00.001+05:30

What a Woman Wants in a Man Love Humor?

What I Want In A Man, Original List … (at age 22)
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially Successful
4. A Caring Listener
5. Witty
6. In Good Shape
7. Dresses with Style
8. Appreciates the Finer Things
9. Full of Thoughtful Surprises
10. An Imaginative, Romantic Lover
What I Want In A Man, Revised List … (at age 32)

1. Nice Looking - preferably with hair on his head
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner at restaurant
4. Listens more than he talks
5. Laughs at my jokes at appropriate times
6. Can carry in all the groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home cooked meal
9. Remembers Birthdays and Anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

What I Want In A Man, Revised List … (at age 42)

1. Not too ugly - bald head OK
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner at McDonalds on occasion
4. Nods head at appropriate times when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers the punchlines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Usually wears shirt that covers stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat lid down
10. Shaves on most weekends